Posts: 1635
Threads: 9
Joined: December 12, 2011
Reputation:
42
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 11, 2012 at 2:58 pm
There is such a stigma attached to mental illness; I can only consider it to be derivative of the fear of the unknown. People shelter in the certainty that "I am I," giving nary a thought that there ain't no I; what there is, is mind. An emergent simulation of brain built up from conscious perspective of self over the course of a lifetime that isn't crafted from words and concept so much as emotional context and patterns of memory that may not even resemble the actual events that formed those memories.
I cannot tell you about sanity; I don't consider such exists beyond established norms of consistent behavior, I never had a shrink tell me otherwise. As a certified psychopath, I've spent plenty of times with shrinks; as a man who spent most of his life on or a moment away from the streets, the quality of mental health care I received was less than optimal. I have subsidized housing which requires a regular visit to the "looney bin;' which is a corporation sponsored by government funding to attend the mental-health needs of the poor. Being in Arizona is knowing only two states rank lower in this quality of care.
Yet I'll call it like I see it; what other health care is there? People go in for check-ups and screenings and dental cleanings, but a therapist is taboo? That's just senseless. Everyday the self faces emotional trauma, everyday the self relives the emotional context of memory; and every time these memories are visited, it is by an I built from the emotional context of what came before. The common conception of "sane" is a fortress of stone when in actuality is is a tar-paper shack being continually remodeled. It is not "sane" to wait for symptomatology to manifest; it is far more "sane" to decode the emotional context involved in the creation of self with psychological evaluation and counseling.
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation:
133
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:02 am
I suffer from Bi Polar disorder and I was last regularly active at these forums for a handful of years straight right up until I had an 8 week break from the forums after attempting suicide with a large overdose of Lithium.
I now feel I have so much to catch up on that I'm having trouble becoming active on these forums again. And part of me feels I should just leave it at that. But another part of me wants to catch up again and become active again.
Anyway, I've suffered from Bipolarity since I was 18. Well, that's when I was diagnosed - I think it kind of started a year or two earlier than that.
My first episode of illness was actually not depression it was mania.
Anyway, I hardly ever post here nowadays but maybe I can change that and maybe I should. I'm not sure really.
Posts: 13051
Threads: 66
Joined: February 7, 2011
Reputation:
92
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:35 am
(This post was last modified: January 16, 2012 at 11:16 am by Faith No More.)
How have things been going? I don't know if you remember chatting with me before but we discussed these health issues for a while.
At least give coming back a shot, and if you don't like it, you don't have to come back. Many people here, including myself, have struggled with mental illness, so we can help in any way you want us to, even if it just means listening.
Since others have shared, I feel I will share some of my backgroud. My depression started about when I was 13, but it was mild until it was triggered by some things in my life at the age of 15. Along with it came severe social anxiety. I was first hospitalized at 16 and subsequently 7 more times until I was 27. I decided I needed to be proactive in my recovery process, so I spent the next few years quitting drugs. I then worked on keeping a good sleep cycle and trying to deveolp some sort of routine during the day. These things plus a new antidepressant that worked very well for me have given me the ability to almost entirely manage my deprssion starting 2 years ago.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation:
133
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:37 am
(This post was last modified: January 16, 2012 at 10:38 am by Edwardo Piet.)
Things have been rather dull for me lately since my recovery. I hope that that dullness changes.
Posts: 13051
Threads: 66
Joined: February 7, 2011
Reputation:
92
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:41 am
Well, it's never dull here.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation:
133
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:45 am
(This post was last modified: January 16, 2012 at 10:46 am by Edwardo Piet.)
The dullness comes from inside me, everything feels dull to me at the moment, even my favorite music feels somewhat dull and I adore music. I am having trouble experiencing pleasure.
Posts: 13051
Threads: 66
Joined: February 7, 2011
Reputation:
92
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:52 am
(This post was last modified: January 16, 2012 at 10:53 am by Faith No More.)
I get it now, and I have been there. Are you taking meds? I took seroquel for a few weeks and it gave me those problems.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation:
133
RE: Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support
January 16, 2012 at 10:57 am
(This post was last modified: January 16, 2012 at 10:58 am by Edwardo Piet.)
I am taking valporate mood stabilizers and olanzapine which is both an anti-psychotic and a mood stabilizer.
I've been really really high in mood in the past - I've been manic and so now whenever I feel happy it feels so dull by comparison. I used to do something really dull like drink some orange squash with water and that was enough to make me feel good, now I do what I love the most and it feels dull by comparision.