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A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
#11
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
(May 31, 2009 at 10:30 pm)EvidenceVsFaith Wrote: No. I have empathy and conscience. I just don't get 'offended'.

EvF


Ah, I may have misunderstood. Do you perhaps mean that generally speaking you lack guile and do not get overcome with self righteous indignation? (aka; an attack of humbug )

That you can still be hurt by people you care about?

I have little sympathy with and give minimal consideration to the 'oversensitive' as I see such behaviour as disingenuous and manipulative.


Of course,like a lot of men,I expect a great deal of tact laced with flattering lies from sexual partners.Cool Shades
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#12
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
I mean no mere words never offend me....I like to hear the truth from people even if it's negative.....because I'd much rather be told something bad honestly.... than something good dishonestly - I hate it when people pretend they like me when they don't (although it doesn't 'offend' me, it's just irritating...for a start it's hard to be offended by someone when you don't think anyone can help what they do...because you don't believe in 'free-will').

If someone insults me and they're telling the truth....then if they're insult is true then why should I be offended by them as if they[ are wrong? I.e.:

A: someone calls me a bastard and I am one - I should be ashamed if anything not offended! And perhaps thank the person for reminding me that I need to sort out my own bastardy-ness... (of course if I'm a bastard though I'm not so likely to do this....I'm more likely to 'take offence' even though I am a bastard in this hypothetical case...and they're only pointing out an inconvenient truth.).

B: If someone calls me a bastard but I'm not one then they're talking nonsense, bollocks, bullshit - so why would I be offended by that??

Some I think are worried about others agreeing and rumors spreading....but I don't care what people think if it's a load of nonsense about me and not even true....

And if people are just going to agree with rumors without any proof or evidence of the truth of them whatsoever then those people are idiots - and I don't care what idiots think nor do I particularly want to get to know them....unless they can mature.

So I don't see a rational reason to get offended by an insult directed me whether true or not...

If it's true why should I be offended?

If it's nonsense, bollocks, bullshit - still why should I be offended?

EvF
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#13
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
Quote:If it's true why should I be offended?

What on earth has "should' go to do with anything? Actual offence (hurt/anger) rather than egocentric indignation is an emotion and not subject to reason. I suspect it's a reaction to perceived threat.

I'm really impressed by your level of control and reason. So far,you're unique in my experience. I've never met a human being I was unable to offend to the point of fury. (what can I say,it's a gift) Cool Shades
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#14
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
It's because more recently I have learnt to compartmentalize my emotions more so I am (or at least I feel) emotionally attached and detached at the same time. So I feel like I am 'observing myself' sort of...

And my intellectual and emotional side is kind of intertwined now (well a lot more anyway).

I no longer need a reason to be happy. I need a reason to be unhappy - and I can't find one. It's like my mental state as flipped round. If all the horrible shit that goes on in the world isn't going to make me depressed then I don't know (at least currently) what will...as of late I can't think of anything to worry myself about.

EvF
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#15
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
Quote:I like to hear the truth from people even if it's negative

Keep in mind that what you may consider negative could also be turned around into "Constructive Criticism". In which their negativity towards you, may actually be helpful in some aspects of life.

I would venture to say that most (Not all) negativity from someone else can lead to a form of constructive criticism. The bottom line of that would be; would it still be considered "Negative" if it turns out to be constructive and helpful......Smile
Intelligence is the only true moral guide...
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#16
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
I will always be offensive and offended.
That is being human.

Let us Prey amongst ourselves.
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#17
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
(June 2, 2009 at 10:27 pm)Samson Wrote:
Quote:I like to hear the truth from people even if it's negative

Keep in mind that what you may consider negative could also be turned around into "Constructive Criticism". In which their negativity towards you, may actually be helpful in some aspects of life.

Indeed.

Quote:I would venture to say that most (Not all) negativity from someone else can lead to a form of constructive criticism. The bottom line of that would be; would it still be considered "Negative" if it turns out to be constructive and helpful......Smile

But if it's not constructive and helpful...I still can't think of a reason to be offended. Either they have a good point in their 'insult' and I really do need to 'shape-up' or they're talking utter shite inn which case why would I be offended? And if I'm unsure...or it's somewhere in between the two...still why should I be offended? Simply because of my own confusion on the matter?

(June 3, 2009 at 5:30 am)moleque Wrote: I will always be offensive and offended.
That is being human.

Let us Prey amongst ourselves.

To each his/her own I guess...



EvF
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#18
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
Being confident in yourself is one thing, but claiming that nothing offends you is questionable. It's normal to have emotional reactions, if you don't have a negative reaction to anything, you've got a problem.

I'm not one to take offense to racial or national attacks, but I'd be lying if I told you I don't take offense to generalizations about things like atheists or marijuana users. When a federal lawmaker stands in front of the country and says atheists don't have a place in his country, it's hard not to have a response to that. When someone says everyone who uses marijuana is supporting the people behind the 9/11 attacks, it's hard to suppress an emotional reaction.

I think there's a discrepency in our definitions of 'taking offense'.

Edit: That said, people take this concept to extremes and start taking offesne on the behalf of others, and that's how we get garbage like the Superbowl 'Nipplegate' and hyper-sensitivity you can see in american media.
- Meatball
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#19
RE: A thought on 'taking offense' and 'sensitivity'
(June 4, 2009 at 12:54 pm)Meatball Wrote: Being confident in yourself is one thing, but claiming that nothing offends you is questionable.
I don't know why I'd simply 'be offended', and why that would be a good caring thing. There are more caring ways to react. If it's got nothing to do with moral responsibility and is simply a common way of reacting with empathy rather than necessarily the most caring way, what's the problem?

Quote:It's normal to have emotional reactions, if you don't have a negative reaction to anything, you've got a problem.
Of course I have negative reactions to things lol. I feel all kinds of emotions. I just don't get 'offended' by something when if they're right then why should I be annoyed with them...and if they're wrong then if they're opinion is bollocks why the f*ck should I care about their opinion? And why would I let it bother me?

Sticks and stones. Actions can harm me and harm others. And many people are pissed off by insults of course. But insults won't piss me off...so I don't get 'offended' by them...

And all the horrible stuff that goes on in the world...I feel terribly bad about that...naturally - I feel sad that it is all happening...and I feel deeply annoyed at all the people who are contributing to such problems. But I wouldn't say I get simply 'offended' because I think that's a pretty superficial response to the whole thing. What good does getting 'offended' do about all the horror? I feel sad, I get pissed off, I get both at once, I feel empathy for others....but 'offended'? Why would I be simply 'offended'? That seems different to simply caring and having empathy to me...and different to getting 'annoyed' too. 'Offended' seems to include a bit of hatred to me, a kind of "how dare they do that!" thing. Which I think is destructive - as I think revenge is (in and of itself anyway).

I think it's probably because I feel really bad about bad things but: I take absolutely nothing personally. Why should I? What good does it do? How would that make me care more? I care, that's what matters to me.

Quote:When a federal lawmaker stands in front of the country and says atheists don't have a place in his country, it's hard not to have a response to that.
I just think they're ignorant pricks. I'm not offended in the sense I don't 'feel offended.' It just sucks (to understate) that they are that way! I wouldn't want to be them! Although if I was I probably wouldn't care! - I'd be them!

Quote:When someone says everyone who uses marijuana is supporting the people behind the 9/11 attacks, it's hard to suppress an emotional reaction.

Naturally. But it depends on why you are feeling it. A baby can't get offended by that of course - and that's because there's no belief about the whole thing that causes a emotional reaction. So it depends what you believe about it. I think the whole thing is just as fucking ridiculous as you do, I don't get 'offended' or take it personally though because I don't think any good will come from it. If I could do something about it I would - and despite the fact I deeply hate what they are doing and the way they are, when it's about them themselves - I just think they're ignorant pricks (to understate) and that's why they're behaving like ignorant pricks. Their beliefs are fucked-up and they are driven by those beliefs, so hence - they are therefore fucked-up.

Quote:I think there's a discrepency in our definitions of 'taking offense'.

I think so too..

Quote:Edit: That said, people take this concept to extremes and start taking offesne on the behalf of others, and that's how we get garbage like the Superbowl 'Nipplegate' and hyper-sensitivity you can see in american media.

Yeah. It's political correctness gone mad! Tongue

EvF
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