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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 17, 2013 at 6:05 pm
(This post was last modified: September 17, 2013 at 6:06 pm by Cyberman.)
Got into an argument with a street preacher the other day. He told me we all had to follow the bible, without question.
I called him a hypocrite and said I could prove it.
I said "Do you always follow the bible?"
He said he does.
"No matter where it may lead?"
He said yes.
So I grabbed it off him and threw it under a passing bus.
Just as I said: hypocrite.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 18, 2013 at 1:26 pm
A Jew a Muslim and a Catholic walked into a bar.
What a wonderful example of religious tolerance.
Wait........ isn't this the politically correct joke area?
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 18, 2013 at 1:49 pm
A Christian goes into a pub with God and Jesus. He sits at the bar and the barmaid says "On your own again, then?"
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 18, 2013 at 2:01 pm
Lines I have genuinely used on my wife:
"Hey, I learned something new today. Apparently Oral Sex isn't talking ABOUT WHY WE'RE NOT DOING IT."
"Just drop your knickers a second I need to check something."
"What?"
"I want to see if your pussy has healed over."
From the bathroom:
"Help, help. Come quick. Suck on this - I think its blocked."
Walking into the bedroom with 2 pain killers.
"These are for you."
"But I don't have a head-ache."
Throwing the painkillers over my shoulder: "Good!"
"I know what would be fun - lets see if we can make your pussy fart again."
And she says I'm not romantic.....
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 19, 2013 at 8:56 am
What's the difference between a piece of toast and a dead baby?
You don't wank on to a piece of toast before you eat it.
Sum ergo sum
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 19, 2013 at 9:26 am
hipster paedophile: liked adults before they were adults
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 19, 2013 at 10:07 am
A true christian™ walks into an hotel and asks the inkeeper:
-Will you put me up for the night?
The inkeeps nails him to a cross.
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 19, 2013 at 11:50 am
(This post was last modified: September 19, 2013 at 12:42 pm by Doubting Thomas.)
What's the difference between a brick and a dead baby?
I don't have a pile of bricks in my garage.
Christian apologetics is the art of rolling a dog turd in sugar and selling it as a donut.
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RE: Politically Incorrect Jokes
September 19, 2013 at 12:10 pm
The pope dies and goes to heaven. St. PEter asks him:
- Who are you?
- I'm the pope.
- Who?
- The Pope!
- What's that business of pope?
- Well... I represent the catholic church! God, Jesus...
Jesus, who's listening in, tell St. Peter:
- I think I got it...
- So?
- You know that fishing business we set up on Earth with my dad's help? I think it's still going on!
####################
There was a cuban, a russian, a portuguese and a black on a boat.
The cuban, takes out a nice thick cuban cigar, lights it up, pufs once and then throws it in the sea.
The others look at him in disbelief for the sheer waste.
The cuban says:
- There's plenty of that where I come from.
The russian, takes out a bottle of vodka, takes a sip and throws the whole bottle in the sea.
The others look at him in disbelief for the sheer waste.
The russian says:
- There's plenty of that where I come from.
The portuguese picks up the black guy and throws him overboard...
- There's plenty of that where I come from.
