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RE: joke time
July 27, 2019 at 6:36 pm
Sign on the wall in a public restroom:
"We aim to please,
You aim too, please"
Well if women think it's so damned easy, they can aim for me and they can try and figure out how to best handle a dualie!
Can I get a yea-men!
My girlfriend thinks I'm a stalker. Well...she's not my girlfriend "yet".
I discovered a new vitamin that fights cancer. I call it ...B9
I also invented a diet pill. It works great but had to quit taking it because of the side effects. Turns out my penis is larger and my hair grew back. And whoa! If you think my hair is nice!
When does size truly matter? When it's TOO big!
I'm currently working on a new pill I call "Destenze". However...now my shoes don't fit.
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RE: joke time
July 28, 2019 at 5:17 am
(July 27, 2019 at 6:36 pm)Haipule Wrote: Sign on the wall in a public restroom:
"We aim to please,
You aim too, please"
Well if women think it's so damned easy, they can aim for me and they can try and figure out how to best handle a dualie!
Can I get a yea-men!
If you sprinkle when you tinkle please be sweet and wipe the seat.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.
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RE: joke time
July 28, 2019 at 6:08 am
Printed sign in a public jacks:
'Please Wiggel Handel'
Handwritten addition:
'If I wiggel it, will it wiggel Bach?'
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 51338
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RE: joke time
July 29, 2019 at 3:00 pm
What's the difference between a Ferrari and a headless corpse?
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
July 29, 2019 at 3:45 pm
A chemist started a football team, the cheerleaders were nicknamed the "Peptides".
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109
RE: joke time
July 30, 2019 at 3:13 pm
If Satan goes bald, there will be Hell toupee.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
July 30, 2019 at 3:28 pm
(July 30, 2019 at 3:13 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: If Satan goes bald, there will be Hell toupee.
Boru
Ther’s a death squad on its way to see you for that!
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
July 30, 2019 at 4:40 pm
(July 30, 2019 at 3:28 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: (July 30, 2019 at 3:13 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: If Satan goes bald, there will be Hell toupee.
Boru
Ther’s a death squad on its way to see you for that!
You're welcome.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 51338
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RE: joke time
July 30, 2019 at 5:07 pm
(July 30, 2019 at 4:40 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: (July 30, 2019 at 3:28 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Ther’s a death squad on its way to see you for that!
You're welcome.
Boru
If you liked that, you're gonna LOVE this one:
I have an ursine cloning machine. The function display wasn't working, so I had to put my hand on the machine to make sure it's running. I've said this before, but I feel bears repeating.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
July 31, 2019 at 6:44 pm
A married pair of Egyptologists were hired to supervise the radiometric dating of all known mummies. The work understandably went on for years and years.
Eventually, the couple decided it was time to date other people.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax