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Current time: December 16, 2024, 1:46 am
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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joke time
Cod Offline
Fit as a butchers dog
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#2441
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 8:17 am
My girlfriend used to date a clown. So I had some large shoes to fill.
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Brian37 Offline
RationalPoet
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#2442
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 8:18 am
(January 15, 2018 at 8:17 am)Cod Wrote: My girlfriend used to date a clown. So I had some large shoes to fill.

Wait, so your girlfriend is one of 45's x wives?
Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37  I also have a new blog here at https://www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
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Cod Offline
Fit as a butchers dog
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#2443
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 8:32 am
What's the difference between a Christian woman and a Muslim woman???

A Christian woman gets stoned before committing adultery.
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KittyAnn Offline
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#2444
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 8:56 am
(January 14, 2018 at 11:37 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote:
(January 8, 2018 at 10:55 am)KittyAnn Wrote: sometimes it's funny here, huh? Big Grin
[Image: 53eb87e5-8be6-466d-9e54-b185c0250ef2E1.jpg]

Behind every successful woman there's a man checking out her arse.
...and her phone
"Alone is what I have. Alone protects me." 
“I may be on the side of the angels but don’t think for one second that I am one of them.”
“The important thing is not to stop questioning. Curiosity has its own reason for existence. One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality. It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery each day."
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Brian37 Offline
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#2445
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 10:05 am
(January 15, 2018 at 8:32 am)Cod Wrote: What's the difference between a Christian woman and a Muslim woman???

A Christian woman gets stoned before committing adultery.

The only reason Christian women don't get literally stoned today is because of over two centuries of western secular law. Just staying.
Poetry by Brian37(poems by an atheist) Also on Facebook as BrianJames Rational Poet and Twitter Brianrrs37  I also have a new blog here at https://www.brianjamesrationalpoet.blog
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chimp3 Offline Donators
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#2446
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 7:42 pm
How is sex like an Arizona rain storm?

Looks promising. Lasts about a minute. Leaves a little wet spot behind.
God thinks it's fun to confuse primates. Larsen's God!






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Fireball Offline
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#2447
RE: joke time
January 15, 2018 at 9:07 pm
(January 15, 2018 at 7:42 pm)chimp3 Wrote: How is sex like an Arizona rain storm?

Looks promising. Lasts about a minute. Leaves a little wet spot behind.

Sounds like a rainstorm in Idaho. Three drops of rain, and the wind blows about it for three days.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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Darinda Offline
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#2448
RE: joke time
January 17, 2018 at 12:24 am
A male patient is lying in bed in the hospital,
wearing an oxygen mask over his mouth and nose, still
heavily sedated from a difficult four hour, surgical
procedure A young student nurse appears to give him a
partial sponge bath,
Nurse', he mumbles, from behind the mask 'Are my
testicles black?' 
   
  Embarrassed, the young nurse replies 'I  don't
  know, Sir. I'm only here to wash your upper body and
  feet.'
   
  He struggles to ask again, 'Nurse,  are my testicles
  black?' 
  Concerned that he may elevate his vitals from worry
  about his testicles, she overcomes her embarrassment
  and sheepishly pulls back the covers.
   
  She raises his gown, holds his penis in one hand and
  his testicles in the other, lifting and moving them
  around. 
  Then, she takes a close look and says,  'There's
  nothing wrong with them, Sir !!'
  The man pulls off his oxygen mask, smiles at her and
  says very slowly,
   
  'Thank you very much. That was wonderful, but listen
  very, very closely......
   
 a r e - m y - t e s t - r e s u l t s - b a c k?
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ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
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#2449
RE: joke time
January 17, 2018 at 1:34 am
I'm never going back to our local zoo again!
There was only one animal in the whole zoo and it was a dog.

It was a shit zoo!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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Rhondazvous Offline
Help Me, Rhonda
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#2450
RE: joke time
January 17, 2018 at 9:23 am
KNOCK KNOCK
Who's there?
Atch
Atch who?
Gesundheit
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.

I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.

Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire

Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

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