Question for Atheists: Is coming out as an atheist as hard as coming out as gay?

[downbeatplumb]

I've been reading the forums for a few days and I've come to appreciate that it is a very difficult thing for an atheist to "come out" to his or her Christian family?

Do you believe this "coming out" process to be as difficult and stressful as coming out as a homosexual?

And if so, how about this:

If you are both an atheist and homosexual, would it be better to "come out" to your parents on both issues at the same time to save on grief and surprise?

In any mature society it isn't really an issue.

In England people don't tend to know what other people believe unless it comes up for some reason.

One of my wife's friends tried to comfort me after my mothers death by saying "she was in a better place".

This was my first clue she believed that shit, my wife pounced before I could say anything but I was just going to smile and nod anyway.

[fr0d0]

[Alex K]

How hard each is of course depends extremely on where you are. In most of Western Europe, no one cares much whether you're an atheist, so coming out as gay on average will be harder than coming out atheist. In the bible belt, both can be equally hard, but I think anything connected to sex tends to be worse. In particular, very fundie places will usually also be homophobic, so there will be few places where coming out as gay is no problem, but coming out as atheist is.

[DramaQueen]

I'm not sure they're very close
Atheists are supposed to be killed after three days of (An imam will answer your questions about faith) if you don't repent.
I'm a virgin (sodomy is the crime), so they're more likely to send me to a mental institution.

Of course I don't know what the vigilantes will do

[Alex K]

I'm not sure they're very close
Atheists are supposed to be killed after three days of (An imam will answer your questions about faith) if you don't repent.
I'm a virgin (sodomy is the crime), so they're more likely to send me to a mental institution.

Of course I don't know what the vigilantes will do

I am confuse, you're a sodomy virgin as supposed to a regular virgin?

[DramaQueen]

I've never even flirted with someone

[Tonus]

Do you believe this "coming out" process to be as difficult and stressful as coming out as a homosexual?

I suppose it depends on how the family approaches the issue. By my understanding, for many Christians homosexuality is as much a conscious decision as atheism is, and both are as simple to "fix" as the other: convince the person to accept his or her "true nature" and he/she will reject that sinful path.

The difference may come when the issue is discussed. A gay person is going to point out that s/he did not choose his orientation and is going to focus on how s/he feels and whatever emotions s/he is wrestling with. An atheist will, at the very least, profess doubt or certainty about whether or not god exists, which may be interpreted as a direct challenge to the beliefs of the Christian. For some denominations this either borders on apostasy or IS apostasy, and therefore claiming to be an atheist may not be seen as "reversible" the way homosexuality would be.

[Alex K]

I've never even flirted with someone

That's ok. I ended up getting married, but still I'm completely unclear what this flirting business is supposed to be. Anyways, I just don't understand the reference to sodomy. But maybe it's not so important

[DramaQueen]

Being gay isn't seen as wrong cause it's considered a disease.

But doing it with someone from the same sex will get you fucked

[RobbyPants]

Do you believe this "coming out" process to be as difficult and stressful as coming out as a homosexual?

It's hard to say, and it's probably quite situational. The closest I can give you is an anecdote regarding my own family.

My younger brother is gay and came out when he was around 15 or so. I wasn't there for the conversation with my parents, but they are both quite supportive of him. They attend a church that does not condone homosexuality.

I came out as atheist to my parents around two or three years ago (having been out of their house for probably around eight years by that time). We still have a good relationship, but so far as I can tell, they seem to regard this as me "going through a phase". We otherwise never really talk about it, and it doesn't seem to be something they want to talk about.

So, anecdotally, coming out for either to my parents seemed to be about the same, although they seem outwardly accepting of homosexuality and quietly, yet begrudgingly tolerant of atheism.