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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 8:50 am
(This post was last modified: January 7, 2015 at 8:51 am by Alex K.)
You are probably totally right. I would sorely miss bashing religion over breakfast with my wife, though 
(January 7, 2015 at 8:48 am)One Above All Wrote: It was my experience that discussing hot-button topics with someone you hope to have a long-lasting relationship with doesn't work. Not discussing them (within reason; I'll define this in the next paragraph) seemed like the logical option, given the ultimate goal you both share (a relationship).
Obviously, this excludes issues that, if left alone, will destroy the relationship. Religion isn't one of them, unless you're dating a fundy (in which case you're an idiot for seeking a relationship with them, IMO).
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Psalm 14, KJV revised edition
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 9:02 am
(January 5, 2015 at 8:49 pm)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: I have recently started seeing a girl that I found out goes to church semi regularly. I'm not 100% sure if she knows I'm a atheist, I have made allusions around her when we are around others, but by and large I don't really care about religion in my day to day life.
I know she doesn't hold any bigotry because of it and she doesn't bring up religion either so I think I am safe for now.
However I also know that it is something she draws solice from since her parents are both dead. I have already resolved that if it ever comes up I will be entirely honest with her, but I won't try to convert her. Still I want more advice. This is new territory for me in many ways.
don't talk about the stuff they believe in that you don't believe in.
I've done the same when I dated muslims, christians a hindu, a girl who believed in mermaids, and so on.
Personally if a girl STARTED the argument about the superstitious thing she believed in with me I wouldn't be able to stop myself from arguing back.
But with all the girls I liked it was really easy to avoid the supernatural topics and just talk about loads of other stuff.
I'm not going to miss out on loads of nice girls and lots of good sex because of a need to preach against the supernatural but like I said if an argument starts, I can rarely stop myself from carrying it on to the bitter end.
I've experienced it lots of times aswell like in your case where the person gets comfort from what they believe in. I think the girl who believed in mermaids believed something like her friend who died in a horrible car crash in another country turned into a mermaid after she died or something like that, I think it's fuckin crazy but I liked that girl a lot and it kept her happy.
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 9:04 am
Mermaids! That's a new one!
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Psalm 14, KJV revised edition
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 9:07 am
(January 6, 2015 at 12:34 am)psychoslice Wrote: Simply keep religion and atheism out of it, there is much more than these two beliefs in the world, and its healthy to have your own beliefs and opinions. If you can't talk to each other about things you both don't agree with, then don't get too involved with each other because its not going to last.
Not something you're able to do, is it?
(January 4, 2015 at 7:51 am)psychoslice Wrote: I can never stop, life is ever flowing and that is what I am.
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 9:57 am
Ignoring the topic of religion isn't a good solution, specially considering it is important enough for you to post in an international atheist forum... I like to hold conversations with someone about things I enjoy - Namely skepticism, atheism and secularism - Avoiding will become troublesome.
Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 1:11 pm
@OP: You can't respect her intellectually because from your POV she believes in fairy tales, or emotionally because she relies on fairy tales for comfort. Why date her?
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 1:16 pm
(January 7, 2015 at 1:11 pm)alpha male Wrote: @OP: You can't respect her intellectually because from your POV she believes in fairy tales, or emotionally because she relies on fairy tales for comfort. Why date her?
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 2:10 pm
Quote:If she believed in the 15th century water disease theory and didn't take baths or showers but preferred to wash herself only by scraping butter all over herself with a butter knife,
That sounds kind of kinky.
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 2:15 pm
(January 5, 2015 at 8:49 pm)Lemonvariable72 Wrote: I have recently started seeing a girl that I found out goes to church semi regularly. I'm not 100% sure if she knows I'm a atheist, I have made allusions around her when we are around others, but by and large I don't really care about religion in my day to day life.
I know she doesn't hold any bigotry because of it and she doesn't bring up religion either so I think I am safe for now.
However I also know that it is something she draws solice from since her parents are both dead. I have already resolved that if it ever comes up I will be entirely honest with her, but I won't try to convert her. Still I want more advice. This is new territory for me in many ways.
My wife was a born again Christian when I met her. Now she's a spiritualist. Not sure if that's better or worse.
We have come to a point were talking about faith is something we do with other people.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
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RE: Advice for dating a Christian
January 7, 2015 at 3:04 pm
(This post was last modified: January 7, 2015 at 3:04 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
Some girls believe in gods, some girls believe in tarot readings. Some believe in the astrology section of their local newspaper. It would be unlikely that every guy with every one of these girls believes in the same shit (and hey, reverse these genders and it;s the same deal) - and yet....people are in happy relationships, marriages, etc.
If you love someone....you can overlook almost anything. 
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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