How can we make adults believe in Santa?

[Mudhammam]

Passion of the Clause, anyone?

[robvalue]

1) Tell children Santa is a fact, and verbally/physically beat them if they ever question the fact.

2) Never tell them that actually it is unsupported nonsense.

3) Surround them with people who all think Santa is real, and who are all mentally broken down so that they police each other at the slightest hint of Santa not being real.

That should do the trick.

[IATIA]

Don't believe and your fruitcake will get moldy.

Don't believe and you get a fruitcake.

[downbeatplumb]

I've been wondering why Santa belief disappears but religious belief doesn't. What would we need to do to turn Santa belief into a religion that could compete with Christianity, Islam, etc.?

Here are a few changes that might help:
(1) The real-life gifts on Christmas need to change, because that is too easy to falsify. Either the gifts need to be invisible, or the gifts need to arrive at unpredictable times as random good fortunes. If you have not been naughty, but you still are not receiving gifts, then you simply don't appreciate the gifts that you are getting, and that is very naughty. That explains why you are not getting gifts.
(2) The cookies and milk need to change. Every Christmas Eve, the Santa believers consume a cookie and drink some milk with the assurance that Santa will share this snack with them in spirit.
(3) Santa needs a hell that depends on belief. If you stop believing in Santa, then you will remain on the naughty list until you repent of your unbelief. If you never repent, then you will burn forever in Santa's cookie oven.

I believe in certain parts of the world santa has a helper who beats bad children.

Maybe that can be expanded on.

[I_am_not_mafia]

Easy.

• Don't tell children that Santa does not exist when they get older
  
• Indoctrinate them throughout the year rather than just at Christmas
  
• Don't leave actual gifts because that would require someone to know that it wasn't Santa. Change the belief so that Santa visits and judges everyone.
  

[Bob Kelso]

I've been wondering why Santa belief disappears but religious belief doesn't. What would we need to do to turn Santa belief into a religion that could compete with Christianity, Islam, etc.?

Claim that they only act like they disbelieve in Santa because they're "going through a phase", and that they're just rebelling against the obvious truth.

Claus be praised.

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[Nope]

I've been wondering why Santa belief disappears but religious belief doesn't. What would we need to do to turn Santa belief into a religion that could compete with Christianity, Islam, etc.?

Here are a few changes that might help:
(1) The real-life gifts on Christmas need to change, because that is too easy to falsify. Either the gifts need to be invisible, or the gifts need to arrive at unpredictable times as random good fortunes. If you have not been naughty, but you still are not receiving gifts, then you simply don't appreciate the gifts that you are getting, and that is very naughty. That explains why you are not getting gifts.
(2) The cookies and milk need to change. Every Christmas Eve, the Santa believers consume a cookie and drink some milk with the assurance that Santa will share this snack with them in spirit.
(3) Santa needs a hell that depends on belief. If you stop believing in Santa, then you will remain on the naughty list until you repent of your unbelief. If you never repent, then you will burn forever in Santa's cookie oven.

I believe in certain parts of the world santa has a helper who beats bad children.

Maybe that can be expanded on.

Yes, the religion needs an anti Santa to explain all the bad things that happen

[watchamadoodle]

I believe in certain parts of the world santa has a helper who beats bad children.

Maybe that can be expanded on.

Yes, the religion needs an anti Santa to explain all the bad things that happen

Here he is - ready made for the Santa religion - Krampus

In German-speaking Alpine folklore, Krampus is a horned, anthropomorphic figure. According to traditional narratives around the figure, Krampus punishes children during the Christmas season who had misbehaved, in contrast with Saint Nicholas, who rewards well-behaved ones with gifts.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Krampus

There are also other companions for Santa such as Belsnickel, Black Pete, and Knecht Ruprecht.
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Companions_...t_Nicholas

Here is Krampus:

[Nope]

We also need a way to make the followers of Santa feel superior to those who don't believe in a chubby, gift giving god.

The creation of a few more holidays to get people out of work and school might help also. We can just steal other culture's holidays and twist them to be a celebration of Santa.

[robvalue]

Maybe some public executions of asantists.