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Beliefs, Significant Others and Compromises
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Congratulations also from myself!
I would go along with the ceremony for her Like thehedglin ssys, the compromise would not extend to how I raise the children.
The fool hath said in his heart, There is a God. They are corrupt, they have done abominable works, there is none that doeth good.
Psalm 14, KJV revised edition
Congratulations!
I think what you did is a reasonable and kind compromise on your behalf. Since everyone involved respected your position in it all, that makes a big difference. I would probably have made the same compromise. I agree with others, I'd never agree to indoctrination of children though. Feel free to send me a private message.
Please visit my website here! It's got lots of information about atheism/theism and support for new atheists. Index of useful threads and discussions Index of my best videos Quickstart guide to the forum   RE: Beliefs, Significant Others and Compromises
September 6, 2015 at 4:39 am
(This post was last modified: September 6, 2015 at 4:39 am by Longhorn.)
in the future I could probably compromise to an extent if the relationship was strong enough
Right now, I just can't picture dating a deeply religious christian at all. Not sure about other religions. Still too soon I guess?  (September 6, 2015 at 4:39 am)Neimenovic Wrote: in the future I could probably compromise to an extent if the relationship was strong enough Totally... but "deeply" is another story.
Nolite te bastardes carborundorum.
 (September 6, 2015 at 1:26 am)Whateverist the White Wrote:(September 6, 2015 at 1:14 am)Parkers Tan Wrote: Love is in part about compromise. If our love was deep enough, I would compromise. Yeah, there's that.  (September 6, 2015 at 12:57 am)Starvald Demelain Wrote: As I see it, she included the religious aspects to please the vast majority of our friends and family and I'm fine with that. They're her beliefs (sort of) and since I don't see it as any skin off my bones I didn't mind. My only stipulation was that I wouldn't personally invoke any gods, and that I wasn't spoken for in that manner by the pastor (who readily respected my line in the sand).Bold Mine First off Congrats! I think your "line in the sand" is an important point in compromise. Each person needs to let the other know where that line is and what they consider "crossing it". If you can't set those boundaries then it becomes a shaky compromise. My wife is Catholic, but only in up bringing. She does believe in god. Our compromise is that we can discuss our different beliefs but not attack or change a discussion into a debate. We do like to tease each other and sometimes the tease will hit close to the line. If one of us does come to close, we both have a look we use to let the other know to back off. Occasionally we'll use a very sarcastic "Really?" to get the point across. If I let my atheism stand in the way of a relationship in this part of the world (marriage/business/friendship) for all intensive purposes I'd be a hermit.
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
 (September 6, 2015 at 2:12 am)Minimalist Wrote: Never faced that problem, man. My wife thinks religion is as fucking stupid as I do. Like you, I held out for a nice atheist woman. I would not marry someone who believed in a god, so there would be no issue of compromising on this point. I would not marry someone who believed in a god for the same reason I would not marry someone who believed in Santa or leprechauns. Such beliefs are too silly and I could not respect such beliefs. People talk about "tolerance" and so forth when I say such things. I tolerate the neighbors. I hope to have better feelings for my spouse. And in fact I do. Other people choose differently. Sometimes it seems to work out for them, and sometimes not. I hope it works out for Starvald Demelain. "A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence." — David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
A friend of mine converted to Catholic from RLDS. I think being able to drink and smoke was FAR more import to him than any strictly religious concerns.
The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it.
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