Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 27, 2024, 3:26 pm
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
Edwardo Piet Away
Devil's Supercardo.
Religious Views: Atheistic panexperientialism
Posts: 43162
Threads: 720
Joined: September 21, 2008
Reputation: 133
#21
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 4:53 am
THAT'S NUMBERWANG!
Find
Reply
Homeless Nutter Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: No, thank you.
Posts: 3541
Threads: 0
Joined: January 20, 2015
Reputation: 35
#22
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 6:22 am (This post was last modified: February 6, 2016 at 6:28 am by Homeless Nutter.)
(February 6, 2016 at 4:41 am)robvalue Wrote: Why not just magic Jesus into existence anyway? Seems like a lot of fucking around.

Yeah - that always bugged me as well. God can >poof< the Universe into existence, create adult human beings out of mud, or a piece of bone, but Jesus had to spend 9 months in a womb. Damn - he must have been bored sh*tless.  Tongue
"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one." - George Bernard Shaw
Find
Reply
robvalue Offline
Chainsaw of logic
*****
Religious Views: Time to wake up
Posts: 29107
Threads: 218
Joined: August 9, 2014
Reputation: 155
#23
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 6:23 am
(February 6, 2016 at 4:41 am)robvalue Wrote: Why not just magic Jesus into existence anyway? Seems like a lot of fucking around.

I've heard crap like, "Jesus had to be fully human". Well, God magicked up fully human humans before, right? I forget their names. If he can't do it now, that's another arbitrary restriction to try and account for the ludicrous nature of the problem at hand.
Feel free to send me a private message.
Please visit my website here! It's got lots of information about atheism/theism and support for new atheists.

Index of useful threads and discussions
Index of my best videos
Quickstart guide to the forum
Find
Reply
popsthebuilder Offline
Member
***
Religious Views:
Posts: 657
Threads: 2
Joined: June 16, 2015
Reputation: 1
#24
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 9:52 am
(February 5, 2016 at 1:41 pm)Evie Wrote: Turns out it's pretty hard to believe in bullshit when your psyche recognizes that it's a load of bullshit:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6RT6rL2UroE

After watching the video, my questions are:

Why on FSM's spaghetti covered body is my turtley brain not wired for faith when I'm patently a theist desperate to believe in religious horseshit? I prayed to "God" but he just won't let me believe in his shitty nonsense... PLEASE HELP

Is it possible that God DIDN'T give me a brain that is pre-wired for receptivity to "His" existence to make it more difficult for my turtley self to believe in his relgious horseshit?

P.S. I'm not a theist. But other than that this is the gosh darn it truth. Hmmm. Hang on I'm not against swearing: Other than that this is the ABSOLUTE FUCK-BASTARDING TRUTH.
I believe in a creative force for all existence, yet have trouble with many man made doctrine.

Faith in selfless Unity for Good.
Find
Reply
The Grand Nudger Offline
Retired Staff
*****
Religious Views: Invasive
Posts: 67295
Threads: 140
Joined: June 28, 2011
Reputation: 162
#25
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 10:14 am
"A creative force for all existence" -is- a man made doctrine......
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
Find
Reply
popsthebuilder Offline
Member
***
Religious Views:
Posts: 657
Threads: 2
Joined: June 16, 2015
Reputation: 1
#26
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 10:02 pm
(February 6, 2016 at 10:14 am)Rhythm Wrote: "A creative force for all existence" -is- a man made doctrine......
No it isn't. Everything came from something.

Faith in selfless Unity for Good.
Find
Reply
ApeNotKillApe Offline
Goalpost chaperone
***
Religious Views: Orthodoxymoron
Posts: 2292
Threads: 16
Joined: September 28, 2015
Reputation: 24
#27
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 10:15 pm (This post was last modified: February 6, 2016 at 10:34 pm by ApeNotKillApe.)
No it didn't.
I am John Cena's hip-hop album.
Find
Reply
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#28
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 11:44 pm
The human mind certainly is creative!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply
Homeless Nutter Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: No, thank you.
Posts: 3541
Threads: 0
Joined: January 20, 2015
Reputation: 35
#29
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 6, 2016 at 11:56 pm
(February 6, 2016 at 10:02 pm)popsthebuilder Wrote: No it isn't. Everything came from something.

Bullshit. Only a really stupid and ignorant person can make such uninformed statements. Have you seen "everything"? Do you know "everything"? No? Then how can you make judgements about "everything", you dumbass?

Also - if "everything came from something" - then where did your god come from, huh? You did say "everything", didn't you? So - by definition - that includes god, because "everything" includes everything. So tell me - who, or what shat your dumb god out? And shouldn't you be praying to THAT? Unless of course THAT also came from something, and that something - from yet something else, and so on, and so on - because "everything came from something".

Ugh, dumb people... SMH...
"The fact that a believer is happier than a skeptic is no more to the point than the fact that a drunken man is happier than a sober one." - George Bernard Shaw
Find
Reply
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#30
RE: I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?
February 7, 2016 at 12:50 am
Popsthebuilder.exe has experienced a fault caused by homelessnutter.DLL.
The system will now reboot!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
I'm a theist. So why can't I bring myself to believe in the religious horseshit?

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
Rainbow Why I believe in Judge Judy AkiraTheViking 31 2578 July 2, 2021 at 6:43 pm
Last Post: AkiraTheViking
  The cognitive dissonance theist might feel. Brian37 1 351 March 22, 2018 at 7:56 pm
Last Post: rskovride
  "Don't Bring Me Down, TRUTH" Brian37 2 772 January 24, 2018 at 6:25 pm
Last Post: Brian37
  Making a fool of myself again robvalue 43 5538 January 28, 2016 at 2:08 pm
Last Post: robvalue



Users browsing this thread: 6 Guest(s)