Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 12, 2024, 8:50 am

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
#21
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
"Then I'll give you a little wedding present...some AIDS."

http://www.chick.com/m/reading/tracts/re...p?stk=0034
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
Reply
#22
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
(October 25, 2016 at 3:11 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: So, is there an anti-Jack Chick tract tract ??

Please post if anybody finds something, thanks !!

Nearest I know of are these Chick parodies, which used to be on Rev J Huger'ssite (the home of the original Kissing Hank's Ass).

I'm sure there'll be tons of anti-Jack ones along in exttremely short order.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Reply
#23
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
(October 25, 2016 at 3:11 pm)vorlon13 Wrote: So, is there an anti-Jack Chick tract tract ??

Please post if anybody finds something, thanks !!
"Ask and ye shall receive..." Jack Chick parody tracts.

http://www.weirdcrap.com/chick/intro.html

edit: didn't even see your post Stimbo Wink
"Leave it to me to find a way to be,
Consider me a satellite forever orbiting,
I knew the rules but the rules did not know me, guaranteed." - Eddie Vedder
Reply
#24
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
(October 25, 2016 at 12:29 pm)Tiberius Wrote: He also legitimately believed that millions of children lost their souls due to Harry Potter.

That would be "illegitimately", I think. He may have sincerely believed it, but it's not a legitimate belief for a whole cauldron of reasons.
Reply
#25
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
Nothing will ever top Dark Dungeons for me. There's even a fantastic film adaptation that I highly recommend.

[Image: 0046_07.gif]
I don't believe you. Get over it.
Reply
#26
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
(October 25, 2016 at 5:10 pm)Arkilogue Wrote: edit: didn't even see your post Stimbo Wink

That's okay; I'm frequently mistaken for being absent Smile.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Reply
#27
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
This one's epic, too, but I can't help but notice that he omitted the part where Lot's daughters proceed to get him drunk and hop on his dick.

https://www.chick.com/m/reading/tracts/r...p?stk=0273
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
Reply
#28
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
So in Jack Chick's world, men who would look more at ease trying to sell your great aunt a used Ford Festiva are Christ's most fearsome advocates, turning gays and sinners back to the LORD (because apparently these dumbfucks need to capitalise LORD to make him seem big and scary, rawr) left and right.

What a fascinatingly twisted mind. I must acquire his brain...
[Image: rySLj1k.png]

If you have any serious concerns, are being harassed, or just need someone to talk to, feel free to contact me via PM
Reply
#29
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
(October 25, 2016 at 6:13 pm)Iroscato Wrote: So in Jack Chick's world, men who would look more at ease trying to sell your great aunt a used Ford Festiva are Christ's most fearsome advocates, turning gays and sinners back to the LORD (because apparently these dumbfucks need to capitalise LORD to make him seem big and scary, rawr) left and right.

What a fascinatingly twisted mind. I must acquire his brain...

Look for the jar marked "Abby ... Something."
Reply
#30
RE: Jack Chick, author of "Chick Tracts", dead at 92
Here's some of my personal favorites:
  • Lisa, wherein a doctor decides the best thing to do when you're a doctor and are confronting a child molester who gave his five-year-old daughter herpes is to preach to him and not call the cops.
  • Unloved, wherein Jack ramps up the angst on some pour soul's life, and, just before converting, tells the guy "this had better be good or I'll jump."
  • Boo! Wherein we learn Halloween is Satan's birthday, except it's really not (yes, this ambiguity is in the tract itself) and Satan takes the form of a jack-o-lantern headed serial killer with a chainsaw.
  • Still no Revival? Wherein it turns out Jack is apparently a good enough fan of Family Guy that he could draw Peter and Stewie 100% on model.
  • Here Comes the Judge, wherein Jack somehow manages to create an insanely convoluted plot in the span of his standard 40-some panels and still find the time to shoehorn in his standard Jesus spiel.
  • First Bite wherein a witch's coven spawns the Antichrist, who can apparently survive until his teenaged years without eating, and converts to Christianity due to an encounter with his first prospective victim.
  • The Assignment, wherein angels and demons micromanage every aspect of a man's life in order for him to possibly accept Jesus before he dies, even one girl's hair care routine.
  • Fairy Tales, wherein we find out about a serial killer's start of darkness, namely, being told there is no Santa Claus.
  • The Missing Day, wherein we learn that, in Jack's alternate universe, the origins of Thanksgiving are hushed up.
  • Wassup, wherein we meet the Grim Reaper (or, apparently his Black counterpart) and his catchphrase of "Wassup?" (or, as his white brother says, "Hi, There!")
  • Where's Rabbi Waxman, a tract I picked up in person a couple years back. I still kep it on my nightstand, between the Dostoevsky and Salinger books.
And that's just the tip of the iceberg. Motherfucker will be missed.
Comparing the Universal Oneness of All Life to Yo Mama since 2010.

[Image: harmlesskitchen.png]

I was born with the gift of laughter and a sense the world is mad.
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Look what Jack in the Box will give you for $4.20 !! vorlon13 14 2170 December 31, 2017 at 8:02 am
Last Post: Gawdzilla Sama
  Fucking Jack Boots Amarok 50 15217 July 28, 2017 at 10:57 pm
Last Post: popeyespappy
  Michelle just jack slapped Trump again. Brian37 0 631 September 16, 2016 at 4:26 pm
Last Post: Brian37
  "To Kill A Mockingbird" Author Releases New Book Secular Elf 8 1847 July 13, 2015 at 9:47 pm
Last Post: BrokenQuill92
  DNA identifies Jack The Ripper...... Brian37 17 3741 September 14, 2014 at 4:38 am
Last Post: downbeatplumb



Users browsing this thread: 2 Guest(s)