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Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
-and it's for -all- of that..if his career will be ruined...that his career will be ruined.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Mermaid Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:52 pm)Shell B Wrote: That reads really weird to me. I don't know how to take that. Maybe he "chased" her, but I think it seems to leave out a lot. If it went on for thirty minutes, we don't get to hear a lot of dialogue and other actions she must have left out. If he just followed her around jamming his fingers in her throat, silently and with no other actions, that's beyond creepy, but I sincerely doubt that's precisely how it went down. The subtleties are missing, and those would be necessary to making a clear assessment.
This is why I am not going to conclude one way or another about whether sexual assault took place.

The claw isn't a sex act, and she never said to him, "Hey, I don't like you sticking your fingers in my mouth." I stand by the fact that you have to use your words. The sex acts that were performed, she herself said she didn't vocally object to. In other words, she didn't say no when he went down on her, and she didn't say no when she gave him a blowjob, twice. Those are the specific things I'm looking at.
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 1:52 pm)Shell B Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:43 pm)Mermaid Wrote: From her account, he did.

"But the main thing was that he wouldn’t let her move away from him. She compared the path they cut across his apartment to a football play. “It was 30 minutes of me getting up and moving and him following and sticking his fingers down my throat again. It was really repetitive. It felt like a fucking game."

That reads really weird to me. I don't know how to take that. Maybe he "chased" her, but I think it seems to leave out a lot. If it went on for thirty minutes, we don't get to hear a lot of dialogue and other actions she must have left out. If he just followed her around jamming his fingers in her throat, silently and with no other actions, that's beyond creepy, but I sincerely doubt that's precisely how it went down. The subtleties are missing, and those would be necessary to making a clear assessment.

Yep, something is off about this description.  Was he pinning her down?  Holding her arms down so that she couldn’t move?  Yanking her back to him?  Pushing her up against the wall?  What exactly happened here, and why is it that we cannot easily infer what happened from her description?  It seems intentionally vague to me.
Nay_Sayer: “Nothing is impossible if you dream big enough, or in this case, nothing is impossible if you use a barrel of KY Jelly and a miniature horse.”

Wiser words were never spoken. 
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Mermaid Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:52 pm)Shell B Wrote: That reads really weird to me. I don't know how to take that. Maybe he "chased" her, but I think it seems to leave out a lot. If it went on for thirty minutes, we don't get to hear a lot of dialogue and other actions she must have left out. If he just followed her around jamming his fingers in her throat, silently and with no other actions, that's beyond creepy, but I sincerely doubt that's precisely how it went down. The subtleties are missing, and those would be necessary to making a clear assessment.
This is why I am not going to conclude one way or another about whether sexual assault took place.

(January 17, 2018 at 1:57 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I think there's quite a difference between being chased and being followed. If I were to describe being chased by a man around his house, I'd say I was running away from him and he was running after me trying to catch me. And that absolutely would be assault, and extremely scary, no question. However, that is not at all what the article says.

I don't think any of us that weren't there can possibly know.

She didn't say we know it. She said that's not what the article says. That's all we have to go off, and it's no doubt a less-than-clear picture. It's size alone is enough to tell us that.
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 2:01 pm)Shell B Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Mermaid Wrote: This is why I am not going to conclude one way or another about whether sexual assault took place.

The claw isn't a sex act, and she never said to him, "Hey, I don't like you sticking your fingers in my mouth." I stand by the fact that you have to use your words. The sex acts that were performed, she herself said she didn't vocally object to. In other words, she didn't say no when he went down on her, and she didn't say no when she gave him a blowjob, twice. Those are the specific things I'm looking at.

Understood. I just don't think we have all the information to conclude anything from this, that's all I'm saying.
If The Flintstones have taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.

-Homer Simpson
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 1:56 pm)Shell B Wrote: Khem, I read the whole thing. Note: she remains naked when she goes to the couch with him, which makes me think he could have thought she was uncomfortable with the specific acts they were performing, not with sex altogether, because you could reasonably assume she would get dressed if she was uncomfortable. The second time, he suggests they put their clothes on, which is how we know she was still naked the first time.
He seemed to keep getting things wrong even as he mouthed the words of a person who was getting them right...between bouts of being gross and rapey and rejected....but he did get his whistle wet, so it wasn't a total loss.
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Thumpalumpacus Wrote: He clearly followed her around the house even as she was clearly trying to impose distance between herself and him.

It may not have been a footrace, but it sure sounds like a chase to me.

I think this might be our guy brains giving us privileged information as to the conceptual framework of getting a hard to get girl......

Yall know that we're chasing you..in a meaningful sense - that we feel it that way, right?  Living rooms, grassy savannah, all the same to my pecker. Wink
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 2:02 pm)LadyForCamus Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:52 pm)Shell B Wrote: That reads really weird to me. I don't know how to take that. Maybe he "chased" her, but I think it seems to leave out a lot. If it went on for thirty minutes, we don't get to hear a lot of dialogue and other actions she must have left out. If he just followed her around jamming his fingers in her throat, silently and with no other actions, that's beyond creepy, but I sincerely doubt that's precisely how it went down. The subtleties are missing, and those would be necessary to making a clear assessment.

Yep, something is off about this description.  Was he pinning her down?  Holding her arms down so that she couldn’t move?  Yanking her back to him?  Pushing her up against the wall?  What exactly happened here, and why is it that we cannot easily infer what happened from her description?  It seems intentionally vague to me.

Remembering, of course, that Grace didn't write it. It was written by a "journalist" whose job it is make a story interesting.
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Mermaid Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:52 pm)Shell B Wrote: That reads really weird to me. I don't know how to take that. Maybe he "chased" her, but I think it seems to leave out a lot. If it went on for thirty minutes, we don't get to hear a lot of dialogue and other actions she must have left out. If he just followed her around jamming his fingers in her throat, silently and with no other actions, that's beyond creepy, but I sincerely doubt that's precisely how it went down. The subtleties are missing, and those would be necessary to making a clear assessment.
This is why I am not going to conclude one way or another about whether sexual assault took place.

(January 17, 2018 at 1:57 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote: I think there's quite a difference between being chased and being followed. If I were to describe being chased by a man around his house, I'd say I was running away from him and he was running after me trying to catch me. And that absolutely would be assault, and extremely scary, no question. However, that is not at all what the article says.

I don't think any of us that weren't there can possibly know.

Just going by her account. According to her account, sexual assault did not happen. Unless something was left out or not made clear.
"Of course, everyone will claim they respect someone who tries to speak the truth, but in reality, this is a rare quality. Most respect those who speak truths they agree with, and their respect for the speaking only extends as far as their realm of personal agreement. It is less common, almost to the point of becoming a saintly virtue, that someone truly respects and loves the truth seeker, even when their conclusions differ wildly." 

-walsh
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
It's a good thing he got shamed. Discourages other creeps. Enough people get shamed and these things won't ever happen.
RE: Aziz Ansari Doesn't Pick Up On "Non-Verbal Cues" and Gets Treated Like A Rapist
(January 17, 2018 at 2:05 pm)Catholic_Lady Wrote:
(January 17, 2018 at 1:58 pm)Mermaid Wrote: This is why I am not going to conclude one way or another about whether sexual assault took place.


I don't think any of us that weren't there can possibly know.

Just going by her account. According to her account, sexual assault did not happen. Unless something was left out or not made clear.

I think she actually did claim he assaulted her. But I am not completely clear on that, the headlines are all sensationalistic
If The Flintstones have taught us anything, it's that pelicans can be used to mix cement.

-Homer Simpson



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