Funny human rituals

[robvalue]

Where I'm from around Manchester England people ask each other if they're alright as a greeting but it's not like proper asking.

Its like saying "alright?" And then the other person doesn't answer they reply with "alright John?" or something like that. Both asking but neither answers.

Its basically a lazy getting to the point way of saying "hello how are you today? Not bad thanks and how are you? Not bad thanks."

If I'm in the mood to be theatrical I'll reply to "alright?" With "It's not important if I'm alright, I want to know how you are, because that's the important thing."

Same deal here in Kent. If nothing particular is happening with the weather, there’s nothing to talk about.

It’s funny how I feel positive even after not getting the job, because I got encouraging feedback. It was like, “We want to employ you in the future”, without actually saying it.

[chimp3]

The topless dancer and the men slipping dollar bills into her panties while some lame Bob Seger song blasts in the background. Hysterically funny!

[Gawdzilla Sama]

Morris dancing.

[Paraselene]

I'm a people watcher, too. The funny thing is that most people are too absorbed in their own little worlds to notice that they are being watched.

[Little lunch]

I think it's funny how men nod their heads when greeting men they don't know but do a reverse nod when greeting a man they do know.

I also think it's funny that, when shaking hands with a man, it's always the little people that have the strongest grips.

Or when people trip over something and always look back, not to see what it was that tripped them, but to divert other people's gaze from the tripee to the tripper, because it's the culprit, not their clumsiness.

[Edwardo Piet]

I wipe repeatedly and ritualistically before I poop. I call it my "arse wipe ritual". It involves wiping until there's no more poop left on the paper. Does that count?

Hehe, great thread, but I can't think of any of my actions that AREN'T rituals I pretty much do the same things over and over again every day hehe.

[J a c k]

I love these. Little lunch hit the spot, appropriately for a little lunch.

[Edwardo Piet]

-clapping. We slap our hands together over and over again to make noise. Someone performed well and the crowd of humans starts to slap hands at the same time and this means something. Lol

Mayo-making. We fap our jeans-sausages for hours until we fill the mayonnaise jar up and sell it to Tescos to be stacked next to the Hellmann's.



Us humans are strange. I hear that Tescos' own brand is not as tasty as Hellmann's as it tends to have less of a true mayonnaise flavor and more of a salty grape bleach flavor. I really dunno how the hell mister Hellmann does it. Should we write to him and ask?

I don't understand it. The 'eggs' shelved next to my own personal sausage are definitely free range.

[rskovride]

Giving a finger wave to anyone else on a motorcycle because....... we both know how cool we are.

Here's to you ... motorcycle man.
Edited to add: or woman

[Edwardo Piet]

Scratching our butts. Why do butts itch in the first place? It has no purpose!