Funeral or reveal party?

[Jackalope]

The deceased won't even note my absence.

[c172]

Well, they're in different states, and by that, I don't mean at the Four Corners monument.

Actually, this came from a Facebook post that was no joke. It was on Facts Vegas, which was a group of fans of the recently defunct Facts. channel on YouTube.

[The Valkyrie]

The deceased won't even note my absence.

Until they start to haunt you...

[mlmooney89]

Short answer? Miss Manners says so. Long answer is in etiquette rules. I'm very big into following etiquette rules to the point where I say "But Miss Manners says..." so much my family will yell at me the moment they hear her name. Here is what she says about different parties.

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Births: As you know, showers should never be given by relatives, although Miss Manners has heard of shocking cases where baby showers were actually given by the prospective parents or grandparents. What they can properly give are celebratory parties after a christening or bris.

Birthdays: School-age children are the nominal hosts of their own birthday parties, presumably to teach them how to be gracious in that role. The fad of parents giving parties for babies is generally indulged if the guests are family intimates or if the baby sleeps through and drinks are served. Major birthdays of adults can be celebrated at parties given by relatives, but should be limited to two for a lifetime (30th and 60th, for example, or 75th and 90th).

But then look what happened: Children who had been unrestrained by the etiquette of hospitality grew up to demand that others throw themselves annual birthday parties, mandating the conditions and expecting the guests to pay.

Weddings: Miss Manners has heard of the same thing happening in connection with weddings: showers and other auxiliary parties that do not originate with friends but are assigned to them by the bride or given by her relatives.

Any other party given by celebrants or their relatives, notably that announcing an engagement, is properly not named as such. As some of you have figured out on your own, the advantage of announcing the occasion when the guests are assembled is not only their gasp of surprise. It is their declaration, "Oh, I wish I'd known; I would have brought a present."

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For serious? Etiquette is a farce.

Also . . . Emily Post is the etiquette queen and the Emily Post Institute puts no such restrictions on baby showers. Who is this Miss Manners bitch and where does she get off telling people how to live?

It may be a farce to you but it's important to me. Also Emily Post has been dead for 60 years so I don't think she was consulted about whether immediate family should host showers now. To her they shouldn't. In the modern edition of her book it does say

"Because gifts are central to showers, hosting by a member of the honoree’s (or husband’s) immediate family appeared self-serving. Today it is appropriate for anyone to host a baby shower as long as there’s a legitimate reason."

I don't think just because you like to host parties for your siblings count as a legitimate reason so even they don't agree it should be done.

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Also Miss Manners has been writing about etiquette since the 70s so not long after Emily post died which means they were probably on the same page of what was proper

[Shell B]

Bahaha, I didn't realize it was such an important subject. Me enjoying throwing a party is a fantastic reason to throw a party. It's like the only reason anyone ever should. You think my sibling having a baby isn't a legitimate reason to throw a party because some dusty old cunt told you so? No one should be consulted about whether you should throw a party or not. Do you feel like it? Yes? Then do it.

[Rev. Rye]

Why can't the reveal party be postponed?

[The Valkyrie]

Why can't the reveal party be postponed?

Might be a surprise baby?

[CapnAwesome]

Funeral!

Gender reveal? Get the fuck out of here with that. I don't think I'd go to that anyway.

[Joods]

Funeral.

Adoption or blood, while no parent ever wants to bury their own child, it is a loss like no other and you don't get a do-over with a funeral. If dear daughter's party can't be rescheduled, then make sure you are there for your grandchild's birth.

This shouldn't even be up for debate.

[c172]

Why can't the reveal party be postponed?

It's somebody's actual scenario. Not sure why te two parties involved are so rigid about it.