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Idea for a prank
#1
Idea for a prank
So, I hatched this idea for a prank (or a series of pranks) that might be hilarious if done by the right people. Not sure if it's original or not, but I think it could be funny.

Basically two people walk into a Christian bookstore, Lifeway or whatever, and mill around for a few minutes, looking through most of the store. They then, in all seriousness and sincerity, approach the person at the front desk for assistance.

I imagine the dialog might go thusly:

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While the other person has a microphone hid somewhere (a video camera might raise an alarm or two), the other guy says, smiling and politely:

Person 1: "Excuse me, hi there! We were looking for a certain book and were wondering if you had it or could possibly order it?"

Clerk: "Sure, how can I help you! What book were you looking for today?"

Person 1: "Yes, umm, it's by Charles Darwin and called "On the Origin of Species."

Clerk: Probably doesn't even bother to check on the computer. "I'm sorry, sir, but we wouldn't have that title."

Person 1: "What the fuck?!? This is a book store is it not?"

Clerk: (hesitates) "Yes, sir, but this is a Christian book store."

Person 1: "A Christian book store?!? So, you wouldn't have any Korans or the Hebrew Bible before it was switched around and tacked onto the New Testament?"

Clerk: "No, sir. I'm afraid we don't. We do have many over 150 versions of the Christian Bible in numerous languages if I you would like me to show you that section?"

Person 1: "Hmm. That's OK. Well, what about like stuff about science and nature and shit? Anything on how we all got here, like, in the beginning or stuff about the cosmos or the Big Bang?

Clerk: "Well, the Bible covers that pretty clearly. We do have numerous titles on creationism and intelligent design."

Person 1: "Meh. What about any books by Richard Dawkins, for instance."

Clerk: "Who?"

Person 1: "The evolutionary biologist."

Clerk: "Just a sec. I seriously doubt it, but let me put that name into the computer."

Clerk: "Hmm, doesn't look like we have anything by that author."

Person 1 to Person 2: "Dude, I thought you said this was a regular fucking book store??? You know, with a full science section and shit."

Person 2: "Dude, didn't you see the angels hanging from the ceiling when you walked in. I mean Jesus! There's a fucking giant painting of crucified Christ on that back wall! Didn't you notice?"

[Clerk listening with dumb stare.]

Person 1: "Shit, man. I just thought we had stumbled into the religious section. You mean this is it. This is all there is?"

Person 2: "Yeah, man. Just Christian shit." (throws up hands)

Person 1: "Well damn. Hey ma'am. Thanks for your help! Sorry for the mix up. You have a great day now!"
---

Just the general idea. It could obviously be adjusted to fit the situation or insert any other books by atheists or real scientists. "Godless" by Dan Barker and "Why I Became an Atheist" my be funny.

If anyone feels inclined and can actually pull it off and make it funny, I'll gladly post any audio or video of it on my website. Or if no one wants to show up physically, a phone call could be funny as well.





Our Daily Train blog at jeremystyron.com

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We have lingered in the chambers of the sea | By sea-girls wreathed with seaweed red and brown | Till human voices wake us, and we drown. — T.S. Eliot

"... man always has to decide for himself in the darkness, that he must want beyond what he knows. ..." — Simone de Beauvoir

"As if that blind rage had washed me clean, rid me of hope; for the first time, in that night alive with signs and stars, I opened myself to the gentle indifference of the world. Finding it so much like myself—so like a brother, really—I felt that I had been happy and that I was happy again." — Albert Camus, "The Stranger"
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#2
RE: Idea for a prank
It doesn't appeal to my sense of humor... then again: acting as a prick never appeals to my sense of humor.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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#3
RE: Idea for a prank
Acting like a prick is always hilarious!

Not that I ever do that. Angel
I used to tell a lot of religious jokes. Not any more, I'm a registered sects offender.
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...the least christian thing a person can do is to become a christian. ~Chuck
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NO MA'AM
[Image: attemptingtogiveadamnc.gif]
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#4
RE: Idea for a prank
I'm not clear on the point of this prank. Wouldn't this be like walking into a vegetarian restaurant and ordering a hamburger?
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#5
RE: Idea for a prank
I wouldnt do something like that..but sometimes I get a bug up my butt and I grab the bibles in Waldens book and move them over to the fiction section...or books like "of pandas and people" that are in the science section, I put those in the fiction section as well...but that about as far as I go.
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#6
RE: Idea for a prank
One of my friends was with someone one time and they went into a christian book store. The guy my friend was with started lying to the workers saying he was on the fence about his atheism and wondered if they had any good books. They ended up giving him a whole stack of books for free and he walked out the door, immediately dumping all of the books in the trash for all the workers to see.
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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#7
RE: Idea for a prank
(March 6, 2011 at 9:43 pm)FaithNoMore Wrote: One of my friends was with someone one time and they went into a christian book store. The guy my friend was with started lying to the workers saying he was on the fence about his atheism and wondered if they had any good books. They ended up giving him a whole stack of books for free and he walked out the door, immediately dumping all of the books in the trash for all the workers to see.

Perhaps you should be more selective in choosing your friends.
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#8
RE: Idea for a prank
(March 6, 2011 at 11:12 pm)corndog36 Wrote:
(March 6, 2011 at 9:43 pm)FaithNoMore Wrote: One of my friends was with someone one time and they went into a christian book store. The guy my friend was with started lying to the workers saying he was on the fence about his atheism and wondered if they had any good books. They ended up giving him a whole stack of books for free and he walked out the door, immediately dumping all of the books in the trash for all the workers to see.

Perhaps you should be more selective in choosing your friends.

It was the person his friend was with. I would have actually read the free books, or perhaps just held onto them/added them to my library.

To do what the guy did is just putrid. I wouldn't appreciate the sentiment if I hated every one of those books that he dumped in the trash. The difference between those who dump perfectly good books into the trash are little better than they who burn them.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
Reply
#9
RE: Idea for a prank
(March 6, 2011 at 11:31 pm)Aerzia Saerules Arktuos Wrote: It was the person his friend was with. I would have actually read the free books, or perhaps just held onto them/added them to my library.

I stand corrected. I would have retrieved those books for my own collection as well. If I learn that his friend did something along those lines I will happily retract my earlier remarks.
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#10
RE: Idea for a prank
Actually my local Christian bookstore has both a Koran and the talmud
"There ought to be a term that would designate those who actually follow the teachings of Jesus, since the word 'Christian' has been largely divorced from those teachings, and so polluted by fundamentalists that it has come to connote their polar opposite: intolerance, vindictive hatred, and bigotry." -- Philip Stater, Huffington Post

always working on cleaning my windows- me regarding Johari
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