Is this guy gonna feel foolish on may 22nd

[Cinjin]

According to the Bible - Jesus is only one. The holy spirit is the one who manages to be everywhere, watching everything. and of course god is the sky captain.

So since jesus is singular and he's supposedly arriving on May 21st, where is he showing up at???

Floating over Jerusalem? Over the Bible Belt? Over the "god ordained" Royal family in London?
Do all the souls around the world have to fly over the atlantic/pacific ocean to meet Jesus?
Is he making rounds like Santa Clause picking up souls in every time zone?
Also, it says the dead in christ rise first? How long does it take them to rise? Does Jesus need a layover?
Is Jesus going to help us clean up the resulting HUGE mess that will be left behind? The plane crashes, the vehicles crashing, financial markets collapsing, etc etc.
If you're in the middle of "rubbing one out" when jesus comes back, does that mean you'll meet jesus with your dick in your hand?


...some things to consider.

[Anomalocaris]

After rapture happens we get to kill every Christian since still being on earth, they are damned anyway.

[Jax]

Heh, this got really hyped up today in Australia, all over the news. Funny thing is, the news reporters are actually making a joke out of it.

They interviewed the man who spent all his life savings, and suprisingly, he said there are no regrets (which I highly doubt).
Harold Craping was also interviewed, and this is how it went:

Journalist: So, the world is going to end this weekend?
Craping: Yes.
Journalist: What if it doesn't happen? What if we interview you tommorow?
Craping: You won't. Because I won't be there, I'll be raptured.
(Journalist in background): Yeah, that's what you said in 1994...

Spiderman was also interviewed! He says he will save us all!

[Cat]

I have to respect this guy for putting his money where his mouth is. Most of the Christians I encounter claim to have complete faith that God will do this or that, yet they're careful to phrase it in very ambiguous terms so that they can't be proven wrong. For someone to make a specific claim and actually bet their life savings on it shows genuine faith.

Or psychosis.

I say "potato", you say...

[chatpilot]

This is not the first ass clown to predict the return of Jesus Christ and I am sure he will not be the last. I read his web page and tried to gauge how he came up with the 21st as the date of the rapture. All I saw was some nice manipulation of O.T. texts being quoted out of context to try to establish that the man of God or the spiritual man can know the date of the return of Christ. I will be one of the first to email his dumb ass when his prophecy does not come true. I am going to put my money where my mouth is and say that Jesus is never coming back because he never existed and the stories surrounding him are nothing more than myths.

[Nia]

But what fun this could be...

[Doubting Thomas]

If you're in the middle of "rubbing one out" when jesus comes back, does that mean you'll meet jesus with your dick in your hand?

Of course not. If you touch yourself "down there," you have an instant ticket to hell.

Spiderman was also interviewed! He says he will save us all!

Everybody gets one.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hdr6SG_t1TU