(October 7, 2015 at 12:49 pm)Evie Wrote:  Almost brought me to tears - what a pussy I am eh?

No.

To tell you the truth, I'm a little bit afraid of men who don't  cry when they're moved, emotionally.

Yeah I was only joking About the being a pussy. I did almost cry.

(October 7, 2015 at 2:14 am)MTL Wrote: I'm going to weigh in here.

I identify as a straight woman.

However, if the circumstances were IDEAL, I would sleep with a woman.

Those ideal circumstances will almost certainly never occur

I have an idea.

(October 7, 2015 at 12:23 pm)Whateverist the White Wrote:

(October 7, 2015 at 4:48 am)Parkers Tan Wrote: This is quite the straw-man here. Finding gay sex repulsive inside oneself is not nearly the same as refusing to be in the same room with a gay person. Are you reading what I'm reading? So far as I can see, no one has said they wouldn't share the same space with a gay person. Perhaps you should read what is actually being written in this discussion.

I don't look on gay sex as a "threat" to me, either. But I sure as hell don't want it. Why are my desires -- and my repulsions -- anybody's business, when I already understand that freedom for all to be who they wish is paramount? When I've already gone to the mat for equal rights? My feelings are my own -- but "threatened" isn't one of them.

I've asked myself why I find gay sex repulsive for my own personal circumstances. I don't owe you any answers (although I've given a couple, which you seem to have ignored), so long as I don't push my views on you.

If someone wants to call me a bigot because of that, great, have at it.  I know myself, and I know they're wrong about me.

Since I agree with MTL, I should clarify that I don't think being repulsed by homosexuality (inside) makes anyone a bigot.  Not at all.  All that matters is how we treat each other and I know you to be a guy who gives everyone a gracious greeting and after that "makes change in the coin tendered".  You're no bigot.  

But I believe there is something desirable about questioning the inner yucky.  It is like when you do yoga and discover that there are muscle groups which are opposing your intentions and you learn to relax them.  I think the (inner) yucky feeling toward gayness is like an inner tension which serves no function, a cultural relic that gives you nothing.  You're better off without it.  The icky feeling isn't you.  It is just cultural overlay.

And I THINK that is at the core of what Rocket was originally saying; that the world would be a better place if everyone at least tried to nudge themselves to confront irrational knee-jerk reactions to stuff that is probably harmless.

HOWEVER, having been chastised by another user, for, amongst other things, failing to notice some of his comments,
and having read back to gather in said comments,

I feel quite bad for an insensitivity on my part.

It's fine to wish that people would more frequently endeavor to overcome their own limitations;
but it is pretty callous to say that to someone who has a boundary they are not willing to stretch
due to a past abuse.

If I'd noticed that the first time, I might have held my tongue, at least a bit.

Especially when the abused party has not allowed their bad experience to make them into a bad, bigoted person.

That's says a lot for their character.

(October 7, 2015 at 1:35 pm)KUSA Wrote:

(October 7, 2015 at 2:14 am)MTL Wrote: I'm going to weigh in here.

I identify as a straight woman.

However, if the circumstances were IDEAL, I would sleep with a woman.

Those ideal circumstances will almost certainly never occur

I have an idea.

Ha ha.

So I had a total fit last night, in my dear loves attempt to drag me out of numb mode over the death of my father we had sex for the first time without a condom. Sweet and passionate as it was, WHY IN THE HELL DID NOBODY WARN ME ABOUT HOW MESSY SEX WITHOUT A CONDOM IS?!!!! I was rather grouchy about the mess and Joseph thought my threats were super funny. Cum was everywhere! Not pleasent! Until we try for midget peoples that man is wearing a hat!

(October 7, 2015 at 8:50 am)Evie Wrote:

Parkers_Tan Wrote:I think you're taking the etymology of the word too literally, rather than focusing on usage, which is, of course, the crux of language.

^ this, absolutely. As I said, Rocketsurgon was correct etymologically but language is a lot more complicated than just defining things etymologically.

It's ironic that he said I seemed 'so angry' he has lost his shit far more than I ever did

He's a good guy, and well-spoken. I just don't think his point is very apt in this case.

(October 7, 2015 at 9:41 am)TheRocketSurgeon Wrote: I never called anyone bigot.

Saying that someone has some homophobia (post #76) is the functional equivalent of calling them a bigot, because the connotation of bigotry is embedded in the word homophobe.

The connotation was what upset me before he unpacked and later explained he was using another definition, at which point I had also already re-clarified myself. Anyway, let's not drag this up again lol. Let's stay agreeing to disagree.