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RE: joke time
October 27, 2015 at 4:45 pm
So, a teache decides to teach her kindergarten class the names of some animals.
She hold up a picture of a horse and asks, "So kids, what animal is this?"
After a minute, little Suzi raises her hand.
"Ok Suzi, what animal is this?"
"A horse?" says Suzi.
"That's right. Now who can tell me what this is:" she asks while holding up a picture of a cow.
After a minute Betty Jo raises her hand.
"Ok, Betty Jo. What is it?" the teach says.
Betty Jo says "That's a cow, just like the one papa has."
"Very good Betty Jo. Now, who can tell me what this one is?" she says as she raises a picture of a full grown buck
After a couple of minutes with no one raising their hand, the teacher gives a hint: "It's something your mommy might call your daddy."
Immediately, little Johnny's had shoots up.
"Ok little Johnny. What is it?"
"That right there's a Horny Bastard!"
Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
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RE: joke time
October 27, 2015 at 6:17 pm
(This post was last modified: October 27, 2015 at 6:18 pm by BrianSoddingBoru4.)
A known IRA operative walks into a pub in West Belfast, carrying a large, oddly-shaped sack.
Suspiciously, the barman asks him, 'What've got there, then?'
'Twenty pounds of Semtex and a hundred detonators,' answers the man.
'Thanks be to Jaysus!' sighs the barman. 'I thought it might be bagpipes.'
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 27, 2015 at 8:01 pm
A 4th grade teacher wanted to see what his inner-city pupils knew about farm animals.
Teacher: What sound does a cow make?
Little Bobby: Moo
Teacher: Very good, what sound does a sheep make?
Little Mary: Baa
Teacher: Excellent. Now, what sound does a pig make?
Little Johnny: Freeze, punk!
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire
Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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RE: joke time
October 28, 2015 at 3:13 am
Once upon a time, there were two Chinese people.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 28, 2015 at 3:26 am
Benny Hill wants his joke back.
:-P
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
October 28, 2015 at 3:51 am
I was in a car park while shopping the other day when I saw a dwarf carrying a tv to his car.
I asked, "Do you want help with that plasma tv?"
He replied, "Fuck off, arsehole. It's a iPad!!"
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
October 28, 2015 at 1:24 pm
A woman was watching a news report about an accident in Brazil. When the announcer reported that 2 Brazilian men were killed she burst into tears.
Husband: What’s the matter, homey?
Woman: How much is a brazillion?
The god who allows children to be raped out of respect for the free will choice of the rapist, but punishes gay men for engaging in mutually consensual sex couldn't possibly be responsible for an intelligently designed universe.
I may defend your right to free speech, but i won't help you pass out flyers.
Those who can make you believe absurdities, can make you commit atrocities.
--Voltaire
Nietzsche isn't dead. How do I know he lives? He lives in my mind.
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RE: joke time
October 28, 2015 at 5:08 pm
(October 28, 2015 at 3:26 am)Beccs Wrote: Benny Hill wants his joke back.
:-P
Dave Allen.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 29, 2015 at 11:22 pm
Hickory, dickery dock.
Three mice ran up the clock.
The clock struck one and two got away with minor injuries.
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
