Not to be a downer but this sucks, I want to call/visit my mom and tell her all these jokes.

UGGGG, anyway keep em coming, she would want that.

I have a geologist friend whose critical thinking skills aren't the best. He's always taking things for granite.

Boru

(April 28, 2017 at 2:34 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I have a geologist friend whose critical thinking skills aren't the best. He's always taking things for granite.

Boru

I know that some basketball players can palm a basketball but exactly how the fuck does one pomegranate? Granite is fucking heavy.

(April 28, 2017 at 3:57 pm)Brian37 Wrote:

(April 28, 2017 at 2:34 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I have a geologist friend whose critical thinking skills aren't the best. He's always taking things for granite.

Boru

I know that some basketball players can palm a basketball but exactly how the fuck does one pomegranate? Granite is fucking heavy.

*shrug* Schist happens.

Boru

I hear there's trouble down at the dildo farm.
Fucking squatters.

This Red Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look.

"Mom, why is my bigger brother named Thunderstorm?"

She told him, "Because he was conceived during a mighty storm."

Then he asked, "Why is my sister named Cornflower?"

She replied, "Well, your father and I were in a cornfield when we made her."

"And why is my other sister called Moonchild?"

"Because we were watching the moon landing while she was conceived."

Thoughtfully, Mother paused and asked her son, "Tell me, Broken Rubber, why are you so curious?"

Today I learned that a school of piranhas can totally skeletonise a child's body in under fifty seconds.

Also, I lost my job at the Sealife Centre.

(May 1, 2017 at 3:59 pm)Cyberman Wrote: Today I learned that a school of piranhas can totally skeletonise a child's body in under fifty seconds.

Also, I lost my job at the Sealife Centre.

Um HA HA, I think if you really did that losing your job would be the least of your worries. 

Too bad we cant throw an orange asshat in a tank full of piranhas. 

But then again, that would be or should be considered cruelty to piranhas.

(April 29, 2017 at 10:53 am)Darinda Wrote: This Red Indian boy goes to his mother one day with a puzzled look.

"Mom, why is my bigger brother named Thunderstorm?"

She told him, "Because he was conceived during a mighty storm."

Then he asked, "Why is my sister named Cornflower?"

She replied, "Well, your father and I were in a cornfield when we made her."

"And why is my other sister called Moonchild?"

"Because we were watching the moon landing while she was conceived."

Thoughtfully, Mother paused and asked her son, "Tell me, Broken Rubber, why are you so curious?"

This made me laugh more than it should lol

i made this one up. It's so corny, it will make you cry.

This guy wanted to get a job working for the C.I.A. But they wouldn't allow him to look at the job openings because they were all in the classified ads.

I told you!