Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: November 7, 2024, 11:37 pm
Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
Cyberman Away
Beta cuck male
*****
Religious Views: Frisbeetarian
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation: 156
#1
Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 8:48 pm
I mean, seriously?

http://www.disclose.tv/news/bible_prophe...017/140276

Quote:Conspiracy theorists have been predicting that Planet X is going to destroy Earth when it collides with it. The rapture is coming and people have taken to YouTube to reveal that the astrological constellation is taking place on September 23 and it matches the Revelation 12: 1-2, which is the second coming of Christ.

[Image: giphy.gif]

Even granting everything else about this arse gravy:

Planets are pretty big.

You'd think a planet one week from collision would be... well, noticeable, by now?

These pathetic prophecies prove the human race is indeed doomed; but not in the way they meant.

You want a real prophecy? September 23 will come and go like any other day, with nothing out of the ordinary happening whatsoever.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist.  This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair.  Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second.  That means there's a situation vacant.'
Find
Reply
brewer Offline Donators
Emotionally exhausted/Morally bankrupt
*****
Religious Views: atheist
Posts: 28262
Threads: 522
Joined: June 16, 2015
Reputation: 90
#2
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 8:56 pm
Everybody know it's hiding behind the moon, just waiting for the right moment.
Being told you're delusional does not necessarily mean you're mental. 
Find
Reply
Minimalist Offline Donators
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
*****
Religious Views: Fuck It
Posts: 69247
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation: 259
#3
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 9:21 pm
Hey, Stim.


Please remind me to visit that site on September 24.

I want to see them eating crow.


Shitheads.
Find
Reply
Crossless2.0 Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 7568
Threads: 20
Joined: July 26, 2013
Reputation: 54
#4
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 9:42 pm
Astronomy . . . it's magic!
Find
Reply
Losty Offline
LastPoet’s jerkoff #4
*****
Religious Views: Pastafarian
Posts: 28389
Threads: 226
Joined: March 24, 2014
Reputation: 185
#5
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 9:44 pm
September!? And the prof hasn't come to warn us!? I am hurt.
(August 21, 2017 at 11:31 pm)KevinM1 Wrote: "I'm not a troll"
Religious Views: He gay

0/10

Hammy Wrote:and we also have a sheep on our bed underneath as well
Find
Reply
KevinM1 Offline Donators
Donator
*****
Religious Views: Nazi puncher
Posts: 5466
Threads: 36
Joined: November 10, 2014
Reputation: 53
#6
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 10:00 pm
All of my apocalypse gear is in the wash from the last one we had... what am I going to wear for this one?
Find
Reply
Crossless2.0 Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 7568
Threads: 20
Joined: July 26, 2013
Reputation: 54
#7
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 10:02 pm
(September 14, 2017 at 9:44 pm)Losty Wrote: September!? And the prof hasn't come to warn us!? I am hurt.

Sadly for us, it seems Professor was a man of his word. He told us he would depart AF if his predictions didn't pan out.

I actually miss him. He was demented but in a relatively harmless way.
Find
Reply
Losty Offline
LastPoet’s jerkoff #4
*****
Religious Views: Pastafarian
Posts: 28389
Threads: 226
Joined: March 24, 2014
Reputation: 185
#8
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 10:09 pm
(September 14, 2017 at 10:02 pm)Crossless2.0 Wrote:
(September 14, 2017 at 9:44 pm)Losty Wrote: September!? And the prof hasn't come to warn us!? I am hurt.

Sadly for us, it seems Professor was a man of his word. He told us he would depart AF if his predictions didn't pan out.

I actually miss him. He was demented but in a relatively harmless way.

He was nice, I miss him too.
(August 21, 2017 at 11:31 pm)KevinM1 Wrote: "I'm not a troll"
Religious Views: He gay

0/10

Hammy Wrote:and we also have a sheep on our bed underneath as well
Find
Reply
ignoramus Offline
wiggle wiggle
*****
Religious Views: n/a
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation: 111
#9
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 10:16 pm (This post was last modified: September 14, 2017 at 10:16 pm by ignoramus.)
How the fuck is it going to hit the earth? The same Christers keep telling me the earth is flat! Make your minds up! Sheesh!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Find
Reply
Crossless2.0 Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 7568
Threads: 20
Joined: July 26, 2013
Reputation: 54
#10
RE: Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away
September 14, 2017 at 10:20 pm
(September 14, 2017 at 10:16 pm)ignoramus Wrote: How the fuck is it going to hit the earth?  The same Christers  keep telling me the earth is flat! Make your minds up! Sheesh!

I'd bet this month's car insurance payment that a majority of the idiots who believe this would be incredulous, aghast if you were to explain to them the current thinking about how our moon was formed.
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Community › Religion v
Again??? This is why Jesus keeps well away

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  "Don't take away people's hope" Brian37 96 12374 August 8, 2019 at 7:20 pm
Last Post: WinterHold
  Get those kids o there! (Theists at Jacksonville try to pray Hurricane Irma away) causal code 20 7019 September 11, 2017 at 12:09 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  Did you know the movies God's Not Dead 1 and 2 did well at Box Office? Renug 12 4894 May 30, 2017 at 3:32 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  Why do far right Christian-Conservatives want to put Jesus in schools NuclearEnergy 41 9587 February 8, 2017 at 11:42 am
Last Post: Asmodee
  Here are 5 big reasons why Americans are turning away from religion — according to sc Minimalist 3 1691 January 25, 2017 at 9:43 am
Last Post: FatAndFaithless
  Why Jesus is not the messiah. Creed of Heresy 59 15576 December 30, 2016 at 5:27 pm
Last Post: Egyptian
  Feminism: why am I supposed to worship women's feet again? WinterHold 168 31210 April 12, 2016 at 5:03 am
Last Post: ErGingerbreadMandude
  Christians - even the Bible says that Jesus was not God so why do you say he was ? jenny1972 299 53956 November 3, 2015 at 8:07 pm
Last Post: jenny1972
  Well this is awkward. Mudhammam 5 1877 January 16, 2015 at 5:54 pm
Last Post: Alex K
  Believe in hell? well you might want to stop dyresand 6 3271 January 14, 2015 at 3:31 am
Last Post: robvalue



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)