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joke time
RE: joke time
(March 13, 2019 at 2:27 pm)Brian37 Wrote:
(March 13, 2019 at 2:14 pm)Divinity Wrote: My son-in-law (who is black) said this today, and got a good laugh from me:

"You know why I'm glad I videotaped the birth of my kids?"

"So you'll have the memories forever?"

"So I'll have some proof when they decide to run for President, and everyone is like "Where's the birth certificate?  Where's the birth certificate?  Can you prove you were born in America?"  and they can be like "Bitch please, my daddy videotaped the whole thing."

You're lying. He'd not black, he is plaid!

He was born in Scotland. I"ve seen his skirt, and never mind his bigger bagpipes than mine. (Note to self: Did I think this, or type it?)

You typed it, more's the pity.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
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RE: joke time
I have heard it said that is there is music in hell, it will be from bagpipes.

The Scottish response; Yes, IRISH bagpipes .. ......I've heard Irish bagpipes. The Scots have a point
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RE: joke time
(March 13, 2019 at 6:09 pm)fredd bear Wrote: I have heard it said that is there is music in hell, it will be from bagpipes.

The Scottish response;    Yes, IRISH bagpipes .. ......I've heard Irish bagpipes. The Scots have a point

The Irish invented Highland pipes a thousand years ago, sent them to Scotland, and the Scots STILL haven't gotten the joke.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply
RE: joke time
(March 13, 2019 at 1:52 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I'm thinking of moving to Switzerland.  Not ideal weather, but the flag is a big plus.

Boru

I am not a fan of Swiss politics, it is always cheesy and full of holes.
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RE: joke time
If life hands you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply
RE: joke time
(March 20, 2019 at 1:56 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: If life hands you melons, you're probably dyslexic.

Boru

If you're dyslexic be careful not to sell your soul to Santa.
Dying to live, living to die.
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RE: joke time
Guys, this is probably the least funny and most depressing joke ever:

In Venezuela right now, with 1,000,000% hyperinflation, the amount of money you need to buy a roll of toilet paper is actually about 10 times more paper (as paper money notes) than the roll of toilet paper itself!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
No matter how kind you think you are, German children are kinder.

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply
RE: joke time
A ballet dancer was practicing on a dock and fell in the water. It was an example of pier-o-wet.
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RE: joke time
How To Speak Irish:

whale

oil

beef

hooked

(say it fast)

Boru
‘But it does me no injury for my neighbour to say there are twenty gods or no gods. It neither picks my pocket nor breaks my leg.’ - Thomas Jefferson
Reply



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