On a passenger jet. 

"I'll have another martini"

" I am so depressed, my wife left me."

"I lost my contacts, cant see a thing without them."

"Altimeter? Who needs that?"

" I used to be a stunt pilot, lets try some barrel rolls."

"Why are we landing at LAX? I'm not backed up."

"Damn that was some good acid"

"We'll be landing in North Korea, estimated ETA 16 hours."

I have a real life things you don't want to hear your fellow passenger say moment once.

I was on a Dublin-Cardiff flight, using a propeller short haul plane when the woman sat across the aisle from me, done up in her best business attire, said to the flight attendant: "Those things on the wings are very noisy. Can they be turned off?"

After recovering from the shock (yes, she literally bsod'ed for about ten seconds on hearing that), the flight attendant said "Not really, no. They kind of keep the plane in the air".

Cue a dejected "oh" from my fellow passenger.

(February 16, 2021 at 2:22 pm)Nomad Wrote: I have a real life things you don't want to hear your fellow passenger say moment once.

I was on a Dublin-Cardiff flight, using a propeller short haul plane when the woman sat across the aisle from me, done up in her best business attire, said to the flight attendant: "Those things on the wings are very noisy.  Can they be turned off?"

After recovering from the shock (yes, she literally bsod'ed for about ten seconds on hearing that), the flight attendant said "Not really, no.  They kind of keep the plane in the air".

Cue a dejected "oh" from my fellow passenger.

Ha ha ha, love his response. It's like a, "Really?" Sure lady, if you want to die."

As embarrassed as I am, both trips to Australia, I really am not the passenger you want to sit next to. I am terrified of turbulence, and I get air sick very easy. I was either barfing, or rocking back in forth and clutching my arm rests. 

As a passenger I was like the old man in Friday The 13th , "You're doomed, you're all doomed."

But to be somewhat fair, I think B.A. might agree with her. 

We hope you enjoy your flight to Yemen.

(February 16, 2021 at 2:29 pm)brewer Wrote: We hope you enjoy your flight to Yemen.

"Thank you for flying (Acme Airlines) our inflight movie will be Airport 77". Yes, I am old, which is why I should not be a pilot."

"Mom didn't want to buy me this simulator."

"Sully is a devil worshiper, he didn't pray before he landed on the Hudson river saving everyone's life."

"For the duration of the flight, ABBA's greatest hits will be on repeat."

‘I wonder what THIS button does...’

Boru

(February 16, 2021 at 4:35 pm)no one Wrote: "For the duration of the flight, ABBA's greatest hits will be on repeat."

Once again, smart ass! But to your credit, I should have seen that coming.

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(February 16, 2021 at 4:35 pm)no one Wrote: "For the duration of the flight, ABBA's greatest hits will be on repeat."

And that affects me how? You should be glad that I am terrified of turbulence, which is why most air travelers don't have to deal with ABBA.