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Current time: May 17, 2026, 9:47 am

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joke time
RE: joke time
Her: So...you wanna go upstairs?

Me: Sure!

Her: You got protection?

Me: W-why? What's up there?

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
The reason Batman doesn't cover his whole face is because he wants the cops to know he's white.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
I just met a French guy at work with cat scratches all over his face.

His name's Claude.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
People keep telling me to turn off my lights to save power and the planet.

So I do.

Last night I ran over a cyclist.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
A woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre, so the barman gave her one.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
What did one earthquake say to the other earthquake? "Not my fault".
Reply
RE: joke time
(February 25, 2021 at 4:28 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: A woman walked into a bar and asked for a double entendre, so the barman gave her one.


There you go, expecting your audience to have half a brain.
I'll take your inclusion as a compliment.
Disappointing theists since 1968!
Reply
RE: joke time
I was walking past an electronics shop when I saw a dwarf struggling to carry a TV to his car.

I asked, "Do you need help carrying that TV?"

And he responded, "Fuck off, bitch, it's an iPad!"

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
Clerk: 'Sir, the self-checkout lane is open.'

Me: 'Sorry, I don't work here.'

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Reply
RE: joke time
Doctor, seeing the scratches on Iggy's back, "I see you're sexually active."

Iggy, remembering the night he was drunk, pretended a possum was Yoda, and tried carrying it around in his backpack, "Yeah. Lots!"

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply



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