Ancient text found in which Jesus talks about his wife

(April 23, 2014 at 11:58 pm)Senshi Wrote: Ancient text found in which Jesus talks about his wife

Christian apologists will just dismiss it as something that was written centuries after the gospels were supposedly written.

Now what I posted in the thread below is real butt-hurt or a*** f****** in my dialect for these Apologists.
http://atheistforums.org/thread-25544-po...#pid654376

Anything that goes against the fairy tale results in christian rectal bleeding! My favorite is pope Leo X being quoted saying "In what ways have we not benefited from this jesus fable"

(April 24, 2014 at 12:07 am)Justtristo Wrote:

(April 23, 2014 at 11:58 pm)Senshi Wrote: Ancient text found in which Jesus talks about his wife

Christian apologists will just dismiss it as something that was written centuries after the gospels were supposedly written.

Now what I posted in the thread below is real butt-hurt or a*** f****** in my dialect for these Apologists.
http://atheistforums.org/thread-25544-po...#pid654376

They've already dismissed the rest of the Coptic texts found in 1945, that say something similar.

http://gnosis.org/naghamm/nhl.html

Quote:The Gospel of Philip is one of the Gnostic Gospels, a text of New Testament apocrypha, dated to around the 3rd century but lost to modern researchers until an Egyptian man rediscovered it by accident, buried in a cave near Nag Hammadi, in 1945.[1]

Quote:The text is perhaps most famous as an early source for the popular theory that Jesus was married to Mary Magdalene. The Ancient Greek manuscript describes Jesus as Mary's "koinonos," or "companion," which may imply an intimate sexual relationship.[3] Although the original text is missing from the papyrus scriptures discovered, some translations "fill in the gap" by suggesting that “Jesus loved Mary Magdalene more than all the disciples and used to kiss her often on the mouth.”[4]

http://en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Gospel_of_Philip

I was able to locate a partial translation of the text in question. For what it is worth, I quote it below:

'And Jesus went into the city with Thaddeus and with Andrew his disciples and they did venture them into a tavern. The Lord ordered strong drink and then saith to Andrew and to Thaddeus, "Verily the old ball and chain giveth me fits. It is always Jesus doeth this and Jesus doeth that. She doth complain that I helpeth not with the children, nor that I am a good provider and doth threaten to returneth to the mother who bore her. What am I to doeth?" '

And his disciples did speak unto him and saith with voices, 'Weep not, dear master, for we have long known of thy troubles and hath taken steps. Hie thee to Ye Olde Jerusalem Boom Boom Room and ask there for she who is called Kitty "Hoots" LaRue. We hath paid her a purse of monies, and she hath agreed to grease thy holy weasel.'

And the Lord did look upon his disciples with great joy and did saith unto them, 'Truly, truly I tell you that you are high in the favour of the Lord and will have a place beside my father in Heaven.'

Boru

(April 23, 2014 at 11:58 pm)Senshi Wrote: Ancient text found in which Jesus talks about his wife

Well, what d' ya know, it looks like Baigent, Leigh and Lincoln were onto something after all.

If only the Priory of Sion stuff were true... on second thoughts... nah.

MM

(April 24, 2014 at 4:53 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: I was able to locate a partial translation of the text in question. For what it is worth, I quote it below:

'And Jesus went into the city with Thaddeus and with Andrew his disciples and they did venture them into a tavern. The Lord ordered strong drink and then saith to Andrew and to Thaddeus, "Verily the old ball and chain giveth me fits. It is always Jesus doeth this and Jesus doeth that. She doth complain that I helpeth not with the children, nor that I am a good provider and doth threaten to returneth to the mother who bore her. What am I to doeth?" '

And his disciples did speak unto him and saith with voices, 'Weep not, dear master, for we have long known of thy troubles and hath taken steps. Hie thee to Ye Olde Jerusalem Boom Boom Room and ask there for she who is called Kitty "Hoots" LaRue. We hath paid her a purse of monies, and she hath agreed to grease thy holy weasel.'

And the Lord did look upon his disciples with great joy and did saith unto them, 'Truly, truly I tell you that you are high in the favour of the Lord and will have a place beside my father in Heaven.'

Boru

Dont forget when mary said.. "thou I grabith Thaddeus and Andrews junkith. for I needith to go skiing and giveith a happy ending"

(April 24, 2014 at 4:53 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: 'grease thy holy weasel.'

Most enjoyable thing I've read this year so far.

MM