For me it's been gradual - more like FatAndFaithless described. Also I converted to atheism twice. The first time I was in college. Then 20 years later I became a Christian again for a couple of years, because I had failed to do my homework on religion. The last 3 years, I have been doing my homework, so it never happens again.

I feel a bit confused and uncomfortable, because the rest of my family and many of my acquaintances are Christians. I pretend to believe, because I don't want to challenge or disrespect their beliefs. I would like to be a "secular Christian" - similar to a "secular Jew". Unfortunately, I feel like I'm being disrespectful by pretending.

(February 10, 2015 at 6:13 pm)watchamadoodle Wrote: I pretend to believe, because I don't want to challenge or disrespect their beliefs. I would like to be a "secular Christian" - similar to a "secular Jew". Unfortunately, I feel like I'm being disrespectful by pretending.

Have you ever considered that the believers in your life are the ones being disrespectful by creating an environment where the mere mention of your disbelief will result in reflexive offense taking and a degree of ostracization? i understand your predicament, but lean heavily towards the sentiment that you're being disrespectful by pretending. To that end and in accordance with your various relationships, it is entirely up to you whether the recipient warrants future bludgeoning with a feather or a mace.

(February 10, 2015 at 6:36 pm)Cato Wrote: Have you ever considered that the believers in your life are the ones being disrespectful by creating an environment where the mere mention of your disbelief will result in reflexive offense taking and a degree of ostracization? i understand your predicament, but lean heavily towards the sentiment that you're being disrespectful by pretending. To that end and in accordance with your various relationships, it is entirely up to you whether the recipient warrants future bludgeoning with a feather or a mace.

Thanks, that is very true. Mostly I care about my mother's feelings. She would worry about me going to hell, and she might also feel isolated in her beliefs. I have been attending a Catholic church with her this year - partly because I do not want to be expected to receive communion (no risk there, because I'm not Catholic). Unfortunately I feel like I don't belong there at all.

I feel peaceful now. No longer scared that I'm going to Hell because I question God's existence.

(February 10, 2015 at 12:29 pm)coolfunkDJ Wrote: How did you feel before you converted vs. after you converted?

There was about a two year period between when I started having serious doubts and when I stopped believing and became comfortable with it. During that time, I felt frequently depressed and troubled. Once I was able to let go of it, I felt a lot better.

I think there can be a weird period where people expect atheism to fill the gap. Like, having a set of replacement answers and rules to follow. It's totally undstandable, it's like getting out of jail, after not realising you were even in there.

I think that's why theists so often call atheism a religion, they think you must have a "prescribed belief set" of some kind. Some set of guidelines that deal with everything. It's just getting your head around the fact that they are not guidelines, they are shackles.

(February 10, 2015 at 12:29 pm)coolfunkDJ Wrote: I have a question for all you converted athiests...

How did you feel before you converted vs. after you converted?

I'm just very curious as I am a new converted athiest and honestly, I feel a lot more comfortable and at peace with myself more than I ever felt being Christian, since I was constantly questioning if it was real even when i was a devoted Christian, there was always that nagging sensation in my head saying "Are you wasting your time at church?"

So please, let me know Thanks!

I was very hateful when i was a christian. In example i bashed at people who didnt believe in god and had no feelings for gays. Now as an atheist i accept people for who they are and treat them all as equals. I think that is what impacted me the most along with free thinking.

(February 10, 2015 at 12:29 pm)coolfunkDJ Wrote: I have a question for all you converted athiests...

How did you feel before you converted vs. after you converted?

On the day of my conversion, my mind was troubled because more and more things didn't make any sense about my religion. I went to a solitary place to think/reason it through. I keep on begging god to explain the problems or show some sign. After about 2 hours worth of begging, I admitted to myself that it was all bullshit. In that second, all the of purpose and design I saw in the universe was gone. And it felt kinda dark. I stayed there silent for a while not knowing how I should proceed. My mind was no longer troubled by nonsense but at the cost of my imaginary security blanket. My only solace at that moment was that life will continue to behave the way it always did. It took me about a month regain my awe of nature and realize that I made the right decision. It still took me about year to build a worldview devoid of god.

For me it was only like my perspective changed. Not unlike cracking a knuckle, everything about me shifted. Nothing had really changed about me, just a veil covering my mind had dropped. It's hard to explain, the only time I can recall feeling anything remotely similar was last autumn, when I realized that I'm actually an adult and not a youngster anymore. After the initial panic of the possibility of angering my god for turning away, I merely found peace within myself and had peeled away all redundancy and superstition.

If you're going to be one, you should learn to spell the word "atheist."