Rapture news thread 15th - 22nd

[Divinity]

I saw a cat and a dog living together. You know it's the fucking end of times when that shit happens.

[Cyberman]

Heat isn't going to be a problem when the Sun winds down. There'll be heat to burn.

Incidentally, there's exactly as much Rapture™ going on here as I foretold. Prophet and loss?

[Chad32]

The end is coming soon. we don't know how soon, though. Jesus thought soon meant within the lifetimes of the people he preached to, and that was thousands of years ago. Some believe a thousand years to us is a day to Yahweh, so soon could be when the sun dies one or two billion years from now. If humanity religion last that long, I'm sure there will be people on the news talking about how revelation was true right before we freeze to death from lack of the sun's heat.

*Cough* More like five billion years, actually - though temperatures could be unsuitable for life within the next half-billion years, if I remember correctly.

Oh, much longer. Though if we're dead billions of years before then, it makes little difference.

[robvalue]

I wonder what it's like living in a fairy tale. I think the only way I'll ever find out is with mind altering drugs.

Things seem pretty standard here in Kent. No more demons and angels fighting than normal.

[Faith No More]

So, I take people have made a prediction for the Rapture for this week.

I seriously think we atheists should do more to capitalize on this lunacy, like the people that came up with the idea of having people pay to have atheists watch their pets when they get raptured.

[Lucanus]

That's it! No more waffles for you!

Hah! Your name has anus in it.

Hah! Your name has scato in it!

(As in, scatologic)

[Iroscato]

Hah! Your name has anus in it.

Hah! Your name has scato in it!

(As in, scatologic)

Well spotted

[JesusHChrist]

So, I take people have made a prediction for the Rapture for this week.

I seriously think we atheists should do more to capitalize on this lunacy, like the people that came up with the idea of having people pay to have atheists watch their pets when they get raptured.

Some facts to help you catch up:

http://beforeitsnews.com/prophecy/2015/0...69094.html

Listen and learn(!!!) about Project blue beam! Behold!

Comment: There will only be one rapture, at the Sixth Seal, which occurs after the midpoint. We are not there yet, so if there is a rapture event it will be a “blue” one—Project blue beam. In case you are not familiar with  here is a quick synopsis. 

Step 1 The first step concerns the breakdown of all archaeological knowledge. It deals with staging earthquakes at certain precise locations around the planet where supposed new “discoveries” will finally explain that the meanings of the basic doctrines of all the world`s major religions are wrong.…Step 2, Step 3, Step 4…This superbly staged, full-scale production will supposedly result in social and religious disorders on a massive scale, which will lead to a one world religion and the global dominance asserted by the New World Order. 

[Iroscato]

*Cough* More like five billion years, actually - though temperatures could be unsuitable for life within the next half-billion years, if I remember correctly.

Oh, much longer. Though if we're dead billions of years before then, it makes little difference.

Speak for yerself, I don't intend on going anywhere.

[Jackalope]

That's some get-my-tinfoil-hat black-helicopters-are-coming reptilian-overlord grade of bugshit crazy there, JHC.