Rapture September 2015

[Kingpin]

We really need the prof to chime in asap so we can all get on with life and bin this thread.

He won't.  he's the only one that's been raptured.

[Crossless2.0]

and dust shalt thou eat all the days of thy life:

I don't get it, serpents (or snakes) don't eat dust do they? Could thou explaineth verrily.

Women have the pains of childbirth because of sin; men sometimes painfully pass stones, which could only have formed if the "serpents" first ate dust. This is the main reason why I don't flash my dick during sand storms.

I learned abut this in my remedial homeschool biology class, chapter 9 as I recall -- right after the chapter entitled "Three Days in a Fish: Not as Crazy as it Sounds" and immediately before the chapter called "Rods and Gods: Animal Husbandry for the Devout".

[Faith No More]

Huggy, do you know the history of the rapture? Do you know that it is a 19th century invention?

[professor]

What do you want me to chime in about?
You guys are doing pretty good by yourselves.
I do check in now and then, oh and Stimbo- that was a good one, had to give you a kudo.

[Huggy Bear]

Huggy, do you know the history of the rapture?  Do you know that it is a 19th century invention?

I'm aware that the word does not appear in the Bible, it's just simpler to define it in that manner.

1 Thessalonians 4
16 For the Lord himself shall descend from heaven with a shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trump of God: and the dead in Christ shall rise first:
17 Then we which are alive and remain shall be caught up together with them in the clouds, to meet the Lord in the air: and so shall we ever be with the Lord.

[abaris]

Tell me again how the serpent was originally a snake. If he was in fact a snake, why is he being cursed to crawl on his belly?

The serpent was the closest creature to human that there was, it even had the ability to reason, hence the word "subtil". Also it's seed was able to mix with the seed of a human.

Or maybe the people coming up with the tale were afraid of snakes? Like, you know, people often are? Because they can bite and poison you, and slither around instead of walking?

[abaris]

What do you want me to chime in about?
You guys are doing pretty good by yourselves.
I do check in now and then, oh and Stimbo- that was a good one, had to give you a kudo.

Glad to see, you didn't take it too hard. Maybe reflect a little on that nightwatcher business?

[Crossless2.0]

What do you want me to chime in about?
You guys are doing pretty good by yourselves.
I do check in now and then, oh and Stimbo- that was a good one, had to give you a kudo.

Oh, nothing, Professor. It appears that Huggy has taken the baton from you and run with it in the crazy relay. Stand down, sir. You've earned your rest. Well done, thou good and faithful servant.

I look forward to next September. Your predictions have supplanted Ground Hog's Day for me as a significant calendar event.

[JesusHChrist]

What do you want me to chime in about?
You guys are doing pretty good by yourselves.
I do check in now and then, oh and Stimbo- that was a good one, had to give you a kudo.

Yay! Prof is here. I mean that sincerely.

It seems we will be having the opty to discuss drag racing come the spring time.

[Losty]

Kingpin, please tell me, do you agree with Huggy? Was the forbidden fruit story actually about Eve having an affair? If so, who was the other guy? I always thought the snake was satan in disguise. I'm really curious to know if my entire life as a Christian (which is the vast majority of my life), I was thinking of fruit when I really should have been thinking of men...

I haven't kept up in this thread, but I have never heard of the story being about Eve having an affair.  No I take it as literally eating fruit off a tree.

Phew. I was worried if the forbidden fruit was a fleshy banana I might have to re-convert