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Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 9:41 am
The Judeo-Christian God finally reveals himself to everyone on the planet, convincing you and every adherent of all other “false” religions beyond any doubt that he, Yahweh, is indeed real. He offers you a chance to ask three questions without fear of reprisal. What would you ask?
My questions would be…
1) You remained hidden for so long. Did you wait to reveal yourself until now because the religious wars between Islam and Christianity, Protestant and Catholic, etc., amused you?
2) So, are the Catholics right in accepting evolution, or did you plant false evidence as the young earth creationists attest?
3) And what were you thinking when you made the esophagus and windpipe so close together? I nearly choked on my beer when I found out you were real!
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 12:01 pm
1. What the fuck is wrong with you?
2. Why do you care so much about gay people having sex?
3. No seriously, what the fuck is wrong with you?
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 12:34 pm
I don't know really.
1) Where have you been?
2) What are you doing here now?
3) What's the point of all this?
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 1:30 pm
1.
2.
3. How much for a hand job?
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 1:50 pm
(April 18, 2016 at 9:41 am)Time Traveler Wrote: The Judeo-Christian God finally reveals himself to everyone on the planet, convincing you and every adherent of all other “false” religions beyond any doubt that he, Yahweh, is indeed real. He offers you a chance to ask three questions without fear of reprisal. What would you ask?
My questions would be…
1) You remained hidden for so long. Did you wait to reveal yourself until now because the religious wars between Islam and Christianity, Protestant and Catholic, etc., amused you?
2) So, are the Catholics right in accepting evolution, or did you plant false evidence as the young earth creationists attest?
3) And what were you thinking when you made the esophagus and windpipe so close together? I nearly choked on my beer when I found out you were real!
God would shock you to your very core with the answers, if you actually were able to choke out such questions facing the Almighty God.
GC
God loves those who believe and those who do not and the same goes for me, you have no choice in this matter. That puts the matter of total free will to rest.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 2:10 pm
(April 18, 2016 at 2:00 pm)ChadWooters Wrote: (April 18, 2016 at 9:41 am)Time Traveler Wrote: ...what were you thinking when you made the esophagus and windpipe so close together?
God, "...because I didn't want you to suffocate if you caught a cold."
Why couldn't you just not create disease in the first place? Or suffocation, for that matter.
I am John Cena's hip-hop album.
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RE: Three Questions for God
April 18, 2016 at 2:12 pm
1 If you're god, why that face?
2 Turn this chicken marengo into a woman.
3 I'm serious.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
