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Current time: November 18, 2024, 5:15 pm

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Famous last words (of Jesus)
#11
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"Do it to Julia! Do it to Julia! Not me! Julia! I don't care what you do to her. Tear her face off, strip her to the bones. Not me! Julia! Not me!"
 The granting of a pardon is an imputation of guilt, and the acceptance a confession of it. 




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#12
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"I'd applaud you for your carpentry, but, you know..."
*nods head towards hands*
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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#13
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"Where are the white women at?"
[Image: extraordinarywoo-sig.jpg]
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#14
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
'NAILED IT'
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#15
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
On a more serious note, he did have some rather famous last words:

Quote:At three o’clock Jesus cried out with a loud voice, “Eloi, Eloi, lema sabachthani?” which means, “My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?”

Mark 15:34   Mathew 27:48   NRSV

Of course if Jesus, god, and the holy spirit are one, they are words that don't make much sense especially since Jesus is supposed to have known he'd be resurrected.  They are also a quotation rather than original to Jesus.


Quote:My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?

    Why are you so far from helping me, from the words of my groaning?
 O my God, I cry by day, but you do not answer;
    and by night, but find no rest.
Psalm 22:1-2 NRSV

Sounds a great deal more the words of a man, rather than a god, even a god in human form.


But if you don't like "why hast thou forsaken me, there's Luke's Jesus who has a rather more positive outlook:

Quote: Then Jesus, crying with a loud voice, said, “Father, into your hands I commend my spirit.”
Luke 23:46  NRSV

Now there's a Jesus who thinks he's going to heaven.  Doesn't sound like he expects to get the same old body back though.

Don't like that?  John's got another version.


Quote:After this, when Jesus knew that all was now finished, he said (in order to fulfill the scripture), “I am thirsty.” A jar full of sour wine was standing there. So they put a sponge full of the wine on a branch of hyssop and held it to his mouth. When Jesus had received the wine, he said, “It is finished.” Then he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.
John 19:28-30

But theologeons are divided about exactly what scripture was being fulfilled.  Funny that.
If there is a god, I want to believe that there is a god.  If there is not a god, I want to believe that there is no god.
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#16
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"My God, my God, why hast thou forsaken me?"




Edited to add:




"A wise man ... proportions his belief to the evidence."
— David Hume, An Enquiry Concerning Human Understanding, Section X, Part I.
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#17
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
[Image: greatfuckignidea.jpg]
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#18
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"I can see my house from here."

"I caught a fish and it was this big"

"What am I doing? just hanging around"

"Nailed it!"

"Why am I doing this again?"



You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.

Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.




 








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#19
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
*In an old Jewish man's voice*
"What is this, spruce? You couldn't get the mahogany?"
Even if the open windows of science at first make us shiver after the cozy indoor warmth of traditional humanizing myths, in the end the fresh air brings vigor, and the great spaces have a splendor of their own - Bertrand Russell
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#20
RE: Famous last words (of Jesus)
"So I walked up to Pilate and said, hey, can you put me up for the night?"

ba dump bump
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