I called a friend who is a believer...

[robvalue]

I'm really sorry to hear that OB

The brainwashing is strong in that one. This is a typical response from someone who has been raised to think in binary terms, and shows the divisiveness religion can have. You're with us, or you suck.

It's sad that she made it all about religion, and about her judging you, rather than focusing on you and how you are. I hope she comes to her senses, but I think anyone who only wants to be your friend if you are in the same cult as them is not a good friend. If they can't appreciate you for you, then their friendship is phony.

All I can say is to tell her that losing belief isn't a choice. The only "choice" left to you would be to pretend to believe for the sake of others, or to spend time talking to what you consider to be figments of your imagination. Of course, someone this brainwashed can never consider they might actually be wrong, but the presence of all the other religions means that either all religions except one are wrong, or they are all wrong. The odds that hers is right is one in N, where N tends to infinity, since there is any number of possible religions that haven't even been made yet.

I hope you can sort things out with her. But it's her choice, and her loss. If she requires you to discard your intellectual honesty and to "submit" (I really hate that word) then she is putting up unreasonable barriers to your friendship.

PS regarding your doubts:

Everything free thinkers such as myself have to say is never presented for you to just believe. I give my opinion, and the reasons behind that opinion. I will actively encourage you to go and think about it yourself, research it, and come to your own conclusions. And I won't judge you if you don't end up with the same conclusions as me. Can the same be said about anyone this invested in dogmatic religion?

You should have nothing to fear by considering every angle, even the aspect of "believing again". I fully understand that emotions will be raw and doubt high, when such a life-changing event has occured. I feel confident that now you've seen through the veil, you won't be fooled again. Buts it's up to you to find your path