RE: If they found Jesus' turd what would they do with it?
August 20, 2016 at 2:02 am
(This post was last modified: August 20, 2016 at 2:05 am by Bunburryist.)
A re-take of scene 18 from Life of Brian with a slight script change . . . .
FOLLOWERS: ...Look! Ah! Oh! Oh!
ARTHUR: He has given us a sign!
FOLLOWER: Oh!
SHOE FOLLOWER: He has given us... His turd!
ARTHUR: The turd is the sign. Let us follow His example.
SPIKE: What?
ARTHUR: Let us, like Him, hold up one turd and let the other be upon our foot, for this is His sign, that all who follow Him shall do likewise.
EDDIE: Yes.
SHOE FOLLOWER: No, no, no. The turd is...
YOUTH: No.
SHOE FOLLOWER: ...a sign that we must gather turds together in abundance.
GIRL: Cast off...
SPIKE: Aye. What?
GIRL: ...the turds! Follow the Gourd!
SHOE FOLLOWER: No! Let us gather turds together!
FRANK: Yes.
SHOE FOLLOWER: Let me!
ELSIE: Oh, get off!
YOUTH: No, no! It is a sign that, like Him, we must think not of the things of the body, but of the butt and arse!
SHOE FOLLOWER: Give me your turd!
YOUTH: Get off!
GIRL: Follow the Gourd! The Holy Gourd of Jerusalem!
FOLLOWER: The Gourd!
HARRY: Hold up the poop, as He has commanded us!
ARTHUR: It is a turd! It is a turd!
HARRY: It's a poop!
ARTHUR: No, it isn't!
GIRL: Cast it away!
ARTHUR: Put it on!
YOUTH: And clear off!
SHOE FOLLOWER: Take the turds and follow Him!
GIRL: Come,...
FRANK: Yes!
GIRL: ...all ye who call yourself Gourdenes!
SPIKE: Stop! Stop! Stop, I say! Stop! Let us-- let us pray. Yea, He cometh to us, like the seed to the grain.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9mfZbTFbk
FOLLOWERS: ...Look! Ah! Oh! Oh!
ARTHUR: He has given us a sign!
FOLLOWER: Oh!
SHOE FOLLOWER: He has given us... His turd!
ARTHUR: The turd is the sign. Let us follow His example.
SPIKE: What?
ARTHUR: Let us, like Him, hold up one turd and let the other be upon our foot, for this is His sign, that all who follow Him shall do likewise.
EDDIE: Yes.
SHOE FOLLOWER: No, no, no. The turd is...
YOUTH: No.
SHOE FOLLOWER: ...a sign that we must gather turds together in abundance.
GIRL: Cast off...
SPIKE: Aye. What?
GIRL: ...the turds! Follow the Gourd!
SHOE FOLLOWER: No! Let us gather turds together!
FRANK: Yes.
SHOE FOLLOWER: Let me!
ELSIE: Oh, get off!
YOUTH: No, no! It is a sign that, like Him, we must think not of the things of the body, but of the butt and arse!
SHOE FOLLOWER: Give me your turd!
YOUTH: Get off!
GIRL: Follow the Gourd! The Holy Gourd of Jerusalem!
FOLLOWER: The Gourd!
HARRY: Hold up the poop, as He has commanded us!
ARTHUR: It is a turd! It is a turd!
HARRY: It's a poop!
ARTHUR: No, it isn't!
GIRL: Cast it away!
ARTHUR: Put it on!
YOUTH: And clear off!
SHOE FOLLOWER: Take the turds and follow Him!
GIRL: Come,...
FRANK: Yes!
GIRL: ...all ye who call yourself Gourdenes!
SPIKE: Stop! Stop! Stop, I say! Stop! Let us-- let us pray. Yea, He cometh to us, like the seed to the grain.
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Ka9mfZbTFbk