(June 3, 2014 at 10:07 pm)Sejanus Wrote:(June 3, 2014 at 9:53 pm)Heywood Wrote: If the son is not interested in keeping a relationship going with the father, what was the point of this thread? Why didn't the OP title the thread, "I disavowed my douche bag father and here is why".In bold: He called him a coward after his dad refused to engage him. Reading comprehension motherfucker, do you have it? also, it's you're*. Were you homeschooled by any chance?
Its obvious that the son wants to maintain a relationship with his father. However the son is wrong in thinking its all the fathers fault. The father was perfectly willing to talk to the son up until the son called the father a coward and ridiculed his beliefs. Now the son is shocked the father won't engage with him? The son needs to realize that the terms of the relationship are decided by both of them. His father simply isn't going to tolerate the abuse.
The son would have been better off just replying, "If you're going to lay a guilt trip on me, were not going to have a discussion. I love you dad, but I am not going to talk to you on these terms, call me when your able to move past this".
I'm educated enough to know that responding to abuse with abuse isn't productive. The OP was hurt by the father and responded by trying to hurt the father. Nobody should be shocked this didn't turn out well.
Right now my advice to the OP is this. Send a message to your dad. Tell him you are sorry for ridiculing his beliefs and calling him a coward. But then tell him you think he is wrong to lay a guilt trip on him...and that if they are to have a relationship with each other...it needs to be based on mutual respect and not abuse.
