A World Made For Believers, Obviously By The Divine

[Lek]

Why do you think that pretending to become a mormon will make you self-sufficient?   It sounds like your bipolar disorder and depression are your biggest  reasons for your current state.  Maybe you are not perceiving things the way they really are.  It seems your family loves you and it's probably true that they wish you would go back to mormonism, but you say that the way they feel about your situation is not presented orally, but rather you can tell from other things they say.  Are you exaggerating what you perceive?  You say that you love your family.  Why not just accept their love and love them back?  You don't have to accept their mormonism, but you can respect them and their beliefs and let them know about your beliefs in a respectful manner.  I don't see any reason to use them to get back on your feet and then blow them off.  Why not accept their love and love them in return?  Many people living in the streets don't have caring families that will give them help.  You're lucky.  Anyway, I do hope that you are getting the right medication and that you can pull things together.  Hey man, your're only 22 and you have many years ahead.  Others have gotten through things like this and you can too.  Find some others who have faced similar experiences and use them for role models.  If they can do it, you can too.