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Marriage problems with theist

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Marriage problems with theist
Mister Agenda Offline Donators
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#11
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 7, 2012 at 1:13 pm
Unitarian Universalism: the religion of compromise.
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Doubting Thomas Offline
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#12
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 7, 2012 at 7:25 pm
You should just be open & honest about it with her, and make sure she knows that you're not rejecting her, you just don't believe in religion any more.

I made the mistake of keeping my doubts bottled up instead of telling my wife, and she was angry when I finally told her that I didn't believe any more.
Christian apologetics is the art of rolling a dog turd in sugar and selling it as a donut.
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5thHorseman Offline
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#13
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 7, 2012 at 8:21 pm
(March 6, 2012 at 10:41 pm)Shell B Wrote: Min has a point. There could be something else pissing her off.

Men aren't rational, either, Min. My ex used to get mad at me when I caught him doing stupid shit. Wink

Running round the house with your used panties on his head whilst snorting large quantities of cocaine?

My bitch gets mad at me for that too.
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Violet Offline
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#14
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 8, 2012 at 6:26 am
Does your stance against religion matter more than your acceptance of your wife('s belief(s))?

Shouldn't be difficult for you to work out from there.

Have a problem to share?
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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kılıç_mehmet Offline
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#15
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 8, 2012 at 3:18 pm
(March 6, 2012 at 10:24 pm)Roshambo Wrote: Hey all, new member here, and troubled.

Over the last year, I've found myself moving from a kind of believing to casting it off mostly to the default atheist position. I read a lot about the subject lately (Dawkins/Hitchens/etc) and consume several debates and videos constantly.

While at a distance now from the family (Seventh-Day Adventists mainly) in IL (I'm in wife's home state of CT) I find myself at odds now. I went through SDA Christian schools on and off, stopped after 2 years of boarding school and finished public school the final 2 years.

I then joined the Marines for 4 years, mostly agnostic. Met my wife around 2009 and married her, got out in 2010 and visited IL for a year while going to college, now we're in CT and I'm going to state college.

While dating we spoke briefly about religion and kids and how we'd probably put them in church schools, and she mostly grew up just going to church but stopped long ago and holds the distant belief without practicing really.

Over the last few months I've come across great minds and works by writers, and also those awesome debates, and I find myself completely atheist now. The wife notices this, and while she hasn't been to church at all and we never spoke of god really, barely ever, she is incredibly pissed now. She slowly got mad that I was watching stuff and that I was intrigued but she didn't share the intrigue I did. She's mad at where I've ended up, and we just got into a huge argument back and forth about things, mostly ending with "well, if we have kids (we don't now) how will they be raised. This is serious and I need to think about this..." then emotional situation for her followed.

My question to anyone who has been through this, or has helped a friend through this, is what to do now. We have an young marriage but we love each other a lot, and depend a ton on each other. We are both in college, and picking up and splitting up (if it comes to that) is not really an option for a long time (I'm 50% disabled and depend entirely on my G.I. bill and disability while going to school - can't stop mid semester, etc)..what should I expect and what is the best thing to do for both of us? I don't want to be a pushover and ignore my perspective of facts and disbelief, and I don't want to be a douche-nozzle and keep pushing things on her.

Thank you
I suggest you go see a counsellor or something.



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Üze Tengri basmasar, asra Yir telinmeser, Türük bodun ilingin törüngin kim artatı udaçı erti?
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Ace Otana Away
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#16
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 8, 2012 at 4:23 pm
Quote:She slowly got mad that I was watching stuff and that I was intrigued but she didn't share the intrigue I did. She's mad at where I've ended up, and we just got into a huge argument back and forth about things, mostly ending with "well, if we have kids (we don't now) how will they be raised. This is serious and I need to think about this..." then emotional situation for her followed.

For me, that would of been more than enough to end it. But that's me.
Think you two need to find some common ground long before having kids.


Extraordinary claims require extraordinary evidence - Carl Sagan

Mankind's intelligence walks hand in hand with it's stupidity.

Being an atheist says nothing about your overall intelligence, it just means you don't believe in god. Atheists can be as bright as any scientist and as stupid as any creationist.

You never really know just how stupid someone is, until you've argued with them.
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Autumnlicious Away
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#17
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 8, 2012 at 9:16 pm
I am always amazed at how far people get (marriage and even kids) before *surprise* turns out they're not really meant for each other because they never connected over basic shit.

Like stuff that matters to you.

But then again, lust and love makes one crazy, I hear, and sometimes loneliness hurts too bad.
Slave to the Patriarchy no more
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The Grand Nudger Offline
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#18
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 8, 2012 at 9:17 pm


I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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AthiestAtheist Offline
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#19
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 9, 2012 at 12:37 am
(March 8, 2012 at 6:26 am)Vaeolet Lilly Blossom Wrote: Does your stance against religion matter more than your acceptance of your wife('s belief(s))?

Shouldn't be difficult for you to work out from there.

Have a problem to share?

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"Sisters, you know only the north; I have traveled in the south lands. There are churches there, believe me, that cut their children too, as the people of Bolvangar did--not in the same way, but just as horribly. They cut their sexual organs, yes, both boys and girls; they cut them with knives so that they shan't feel. That is what the Church does, and every church is the same: control, destroy, obliterate every good feeling. So if a war comes, and the Church is on one side of it, we must be on the other, no matter what strange allies we find ourselves bound to."

-Ruta Skadi, The Subtle Knife
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Violet Offline
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#20
RE: Marriage problems with theist
March 9, 2012 at 1:38 am (This post was last modified: March 9, 2012 at 1:40 am by Violet.)



[Image: trollface.jpg?1296494117]

Post a picture response which adds nothing, receive a picture response which adds nothing.

PS: my picture's bigger.
Please give me a home where cloud buffalo roam
Where the dear and the strangers can play
Where sometimes is heard a discouraging word
But the skies are not stormy all day
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Atheist Forums › Community › Atheism v
Marriage problems with theist

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