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RE: joke time
October 16, 2018 at 1:26 am
Moses and Jesus are hangin' out remembering the old days when Moses parts the Red Sea for old times sake. Jesus then walks on water and sinks. Moses says, "last time you didn't have those holes in your feet!"
My girlfriend thinks I'm a stalker. Well...she's not my girlfriend "yet".
I discovered a new vitamin that fights cancer. I call it ...B9
I also invented a diet pill. It works great but had to quit taking it because of the side effects. Turns out my penis is larger and my hair grew back. And whoa! If you think my hair is nice!
When does size truly matter? When it's TOO big!
I'm currently working on a new pill I call "Destenze". However...now my shoes don't fit.
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RE: joke time
October 16, 2018 at 8:49 am
Saw a news item about a doctor who routinely slept with his patients. I didn't think much of it til I found out the man was a vet.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
October 16, 2018 at 10:19 am
How does anyone know it is "hyperbole". I have yet to see any national standard of testing like alcohol and breathalyzers.
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RE: joke time
October 16, 2018 at 11:17 pm
Three ladies were on a bus stop bench. One of the ladies looks at the other and asks her if she is Native American, She says, "Yes, I'm Arapaho." "Is that so?" says the first, "It just happens that I'm a Navajo." The third lady looks at both of them and says, "I'm a Dallas Hoe!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
October 18, 2018 at 9:45 am
50 Shades of Grey for Seniors
Back and forth . . .
In and out . . .
In and out . . .
A little to the right . . .
A little to the left . . .
She could feel the sweat on her forehead . . .
Between her breasts . . .
And, trickling down the small of her back . . .
She was getting near to the end.
He was in ecstasy . . .
With a huge smile on his face as his wife moved . . .
Forwards then backwards . . .
Forward then backward . . .
Again . . .
And again . . .
Her heart was pounding now . .
Her face was flushed . . .
She moaned softly at first, then began to groan louder . . .
Finally . . .
Totally exhausted, she let out a piercing scream . . .
“OK, OK, you smug bastard, I can’t parallel park. You do it!”
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
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RE: joke time
October 18, 2018 at 12:11 pm
The only God I worship is beer. My liver on the other hand is one hell of a pesky dissenter.