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Current time: December 15, 2024, 3:25 pm

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joke time
RE: joke time
(May 14, 2022 at 7:38 am)onlinebiker Wrote:
(May 13, 2022 at 8:26 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: It’s even more extreme here - national health covers everything EXCEPT dental. Broken arm? You’re covered. Need flu meds? Covered. Need a tooth pulled? You either have private dental insurance or pay out of pocket.

Boru

Not in England...


Ozzy Osbourne said he did not pay a nickle for a mouth full of implants - all covered by NHS...

Implants are probably considered a medical procedure.  Filling a cavity might be a whole different story, which is a shame, because newer findings suggest that oral health and inflammation can have a profound effect on vascular health.  There may even be a causal link between poor dental hygiene and stroke.
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
(May 14, 2022 at 6:00 pm)A. Secular Human Wrote:
(May 13, 2022 at 8:26 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: It’s even more extreme here - national health covers everything EXCEPT dental. Broken arm? You’re covered. Need flu meds? Covered. Need a tooth pulled? You either have private dental insurance or pay out of pocket.

Boru

Now I understand why Brits get a bad reputation for bad teeth.

I’m no longer a Brit. And I could rent my teeth out to advertise Pepsodent.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
Back to the jokes:

‘Jim, you’re my best pal, but you give lousy dating advice!’

‘Why, what happened?’

‘I took this girl out for coffee. Things were going along swimmingly. Then, I remembered what you said about The Face. I did it and she got up and left without a word.’

‘Refresh my memory - The Face?’

‘Yes. You told me to look shy and bite my lip. You said women find that attractive!’

‘Show me.’ *pause* ‘Ok, I think I see the problem. Next time, try biting your lower lip.’

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
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RE: joke time
(May 14, 2022 at 6:02 pm)A. Secular Human Wrote:
(May 14, 2022 at 7:38 am)onlinebiker Wrote: Not in England...


Ozzy Osbourne said he did not pay a nickle for a mouth full of implants - all covered by NHS...

Implants are probably considered a medical procedure.  Filling a cavity might be a whole different story, which is a shame, because newer findings suggest that oral health and inflammation can have a profound effect on vascular health.  There may even be a causal link between poor dental hygiene and stroke.

Until fairly recently, people in my profession used the titles, "Mr", and "Ms" in NZ and Oz.

It's only been in the past couple of years that we've been encouraged to drop these titles and use "Dr", instead.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
An older gentleman goes into a bar and hears the other patrons discussing the ups and down of marriage. “Next week my wife and I will celebrate our fiftieth anniversary,” he tells them.
“That’s great. What’s your secret for a long and happy marriage,” one asks.
“Well, you have to do nice things for your wife.”
“Such as?”
“Well, for our twenty-fifth anniversary I took her to Italy.”
“That is nice. What are you going to do for your fiftieth?”
“I’m going back to visit her.”
Reply
RE: joke time
Matt’s dad picked him up from school one afternoon. Knowing the parts for the school play were supposed to be posted today, he asked his son if he got a part.

Matt enthusiastically announced that he’d gotten a part: “I will play a man who’s been married for twenty years.”

“That’s great, son. Keep up the good work and before you know it they’ll be giving you a speaking part.”
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RE: joke time
Don't try to understand women.

Women understand women and they hate each other.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Reply
RE: joke time
(May 15, 2022 at 8:40 pm)The Valkyrie Wrote: Don't try to understand women.

Women understand women and they hate each other.

I have the best understanding of women that a man can hope to have.


I have learned when to duck.....
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RE: joke time
God: Being gay is a sin.
Also God: Men are better than women. Submit to me. I am Alpha.
P. S. Adam was ok. Its Eve who f up everything.
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RE: joke time
Odysseus: Welcome, men! Today we set out on our odyssey!

Sailor *raises hand*: Excuse me, captain...what's an 'odyssey'?

Odysseus: A long journey named after the only survivor.

Sailor: Oh, thank you, si...wait, what now?

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Reply



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