Opinions wanted

[Sejanus]

So I just had a substantial argument with my sister, and I'd like to hear an outsider's thoughts on it. I'll try to keep it as unbiased as possible (which is probably futile.)
So my sister (I'm going to refer to her as Jane for obvious reasons)
had a friend over on the night in question. It happened to be the night before I started my new job, which started at 7am so I had to be up at 6am. My brother who I share a room with also had to get up at 7am for school. When I went to go to bed at around 10:30pm however, Jane and her friend were talking in about everyday-conversation-level-voices, so after about 10 minutes of this I knocked on the wall (the rooms are adjacent, and the walls do not cancel noise by any means) and asked her to be quiet because I needed to sleep. I suggested that she go downstairs if she wanted to keep talking. She replied saying something along the lines of "I'll keep talking if I want". So a while later when they hadn't stopped talking I knocked again, this time angry, and said "I don't give a shit what you're talking about, but I have to get up at 6am so go downstairs or shut up". To which she said something like "well I have to get up at 7am", which to me seems like a pretty fucking paltry argument. After that they talked more quietly, but still loud enough to keep me awake. When they finally stopped talking I'd say it was about 11:30pm and I probably got to sleep at about 12:00am. So I had roughly 6 hours sleep before I started my new job thanks to her.

The next day after she got back from work she started the actual argument by saying "you were extremely rude last night". Because apparently her having a friend over means I just have to lie awake and say nothing to her. I told her how she was actually incredibly rude and inconsiderate, and it devolved into a shouting match (as it always does with her, because she's notoriously angry in arguments with everyone). I usually try to keep my cool in arguments, and maybe for that reason coupled with the fact that she was completely 100% in the wrong but was completely denying it led to me getting enraged. At one point I called her a "fucking bitch" over and over. And I felt justified calling her this, because if knowingly depriving people of sleep before a very important event isn't being a bitch, then I don't know what is. She then brought out the waterworks and tried to get my parents in on her side by saying "are you just gonna let him call me a fucking bitch" (which didn't really work). After that she stormed out saying she was staying somewhere else for a few days and that she was never talking to me again.
I'd also like to point out that this is by no means the first time she's done this. She often keeps my father up who always has to get up at 6am by either talking loudly on skype/phone calls, playing loud music, or falling around the house drunk with her friends shouting the house down.
Thoughts?

[Losty]

If your sister is 15-20 then I'd say typical behavior for that age group. (Obviously not all, but I'm just saying it's far from abnormal)
Regardless of her age, I'd say from the information provided she was indeed being a bitch. Hopefully, for your sake, she really stays away for a few days and you can catch up on your sleep. My suggestion (one that worked on my brother when we were younger) is that whenever she keeps you up late when you need to be up early in the morning, you get up and wake her up earlier than she needs to be up.
My brother did the ice bucket challenge before it was cool (and without his consent) at 5 am after keeping me up later with his music.

[Sejanus]

She's 21. An adult. I said I was going to do that, but I found in the morning I didn't have time with having a shower and getting ready for work, and she didn't deserve that time.

[Losty]

In that case, maybe ask your parents to stop letting her have friends over after a certain hour until she learns to respect other people's need to sleep.

[Sejanus]

Her listening to our parents? that would be a first.

[robvalue]

I agree that your sister is being ridiculous and inconsiderate, especially given the circumstances of your new job. It sounds like she has a problem respecting other people and a lack of empathy. I went through something similar with a brother who would play loud music all day every day, and into the night. When I asked him to turn it down he did so for about 5 minutes, then turned it up again. My parents did nothing to stop it.

I wish I knew what the answer is, I hope you can come to some agreement but I certainly feel she is in the wrong from what you say.

[Cato]

Sounds like I need to have a few beers with your father. Having adult children in the home isn't as tough as some like to portray it. I had a few ground rules regarding school, work and domestic duties. What was well understood is that if I had to arbitrate some juvenille bullshit then people's lives were going to become miserable for the sake of my sanity in my own home.

Your request was perfectly reasonable, but I wouldn't have sided with you. I would have doled out some creative unpleasantness to both for bothering me with stupid shit. Perhaps your father has figured out ignoring it is the best route for him.

[Sejanus]

I tried not to involve my parents, but my sister was adamant they should defend her, so they got dragged in anyway.

---

I agree that your sister is being ridiculous and inconsiderate, especially given the circumstances of your new job. It sounds like she has a problem respecting other people and a lack of empathy. I went through something similar with a brother who would play loud music all day every day, and into the night. When I asked him to turn it down he did so for about 5 minutes, then turned it up again. My parents did nothing to stop it.

I wish I knew what the answer is, I hope you can come to some agreement but I certainly feel she is in the wrong from what you say.

I think your both your brother and my sister have a terminal case of immature-itis.

[pocaracas]

hmmm.... two brothers, one sister... she's the princess, huh? And your parents just do whatever she wants, or, if they disagree, they just ignore. Can't say it's unusual...

Perhaps you can find some ideas on how to bypass the problem in here:
http://www.forbes.com/sites/houzz/2013/0...n-at-home/
or here:
http://www.nytimes.com/2009/08/06/garden....html?_r=0

[ShaMan]

So I had roughly 6 hours sleep before I started my new job thanks to her.

...if knowingly depriving people of sleep before a very important event isn't being a bitch, then I don't know what is.

Thoughts?

(bold mine)
It sounds like you're adding unnecessary fuel to this fire - maybe projecting a bit?

When having a debate (argument) I find it is best not to presuppose the other participant's motivations.

ETA: To clarify. I'm not defending your sister. From your story, it sounds like she has selfish tendencies. Selfish people rarely put deliberate effort toward others. To presuppose that her motivation was to annoy you or to keep you up, may be giving her more credit than she deserves.