What is the dumbest thing you've ever heard a theist say?

[Edwardo Piet]

Awesome.

[Longhorn]

Conflating trandgender people, homosexuals and drug addicts all in one sentence. It was brilliantly stupid, so much that I can't even repeat it ._.

[The Valkyrie]

Once again,whole new levels of stupid from blondie.

[ForsakenHeretic]

"The cause for the increase in cancer cases is women being able to work".

Yes I actually had someone say this to me.

[Edwardo Piet]

Once again,whole new levels of stupid from blondie.

Blondie is embarrassingly misinformed... indeed.

But some theists in the past I've known make him look enlightened by comparison.

And I live in the UK!

[abaris]

Strictly going by these last days events, I don't know if what I read on these very boards, can be topped IRL.

And on a sad note, I will never be able to listen to any Blondie song with the old feelgood vibes.

[drfuzzy]

I posted this one on a similar thread, but I have to repeat my favorite.  We had been learning about Shakespearean English and King James English at school, and I asked the minister, after the service "why do you use "thee" and "thou" when you pray?
     His response:  "We use them because the Lord used them! That's the way He spoke!"

I was not stupid enough to correct him, particularly in front of my parents.  But the surprise from that moment, realizing that a PASTOR actually believed the Jesus of Nazareth spoke King James English . . . which didn't exist 2000 years ago, has never left me.

[Cecelia]

I've got too many examples just to name one:

"Happy Christmas? Now they want to take Mary out of everything. Can't they just say Mary Christmas?"

"I know the bible is true because it says in it if you change one word in the book, you'll have a place in hell."

"Marriage is between a man and a woman. It says so in the dictionary. They can't just change the definition in the dictionary. God wouldn't like that."

"It's raining outside. I guess God didn't want me to get my lawn mowed."

"If I didn't believe in god, I'd go rob a bank. What would stop me?"

"Transgenderism is just society gone mad fulfilling their nihilist agenda."

"We need to abolish Secular Nihilism. That's the real problem with this country."

"Gay people just want to wave dongs in people's faces. That's what they call love!"

"Religious liberty is in danger in this country. We are a Christian Nation."

"God's punishing this country for allowing homosexuals to get married."

"Evolution is just a THEORY. We need to start teaching both sides in school and let kids think for themselves."

"If you don't go to church it means that you don't think God is worth your time, so I don't think anyone who doesn't go to church is worth mine."

They're like Pringles. Once you pop, you just can't stop.

[IATIA]

I'm genuinely curious. 

I had a Christian tell me "If you believe in evolution, then you think we ultimately came from a rock."

It may have been a meteorite that brought the DNA building blocks to earth. So ... actually ... sort of.

[Spooky]

Well the most basic one for me:

"My loving, caring, and forgiving god will send you to be tortured for eternity if you use the free will he gave you".