To kill a mocking depression

[robvalue]

Oh my Flying Spaghetti Monster! I came here for a quick look (on break at work, gotta get back) and I just want to group hug. 
Robvalue: I'm glad you're doing better.
Empress: I'd like to meet his wife, too! She sounds so awesome.
Evie: thank you for sharing. I agree with Empress. It's nice to see all the differences and similarities.
Atlas! Hey, man! Thanks for your response to this thread. Welcome. Make yourself at home. 

Sigh. This is nice. Feels like group therapy. Lol

Thank you It sure does! It is wonderful I find this very helpful, I'm glad to hear you do too

I also suffer with apathy on a grand scale. Finding the motivation to just do anything can be very hard. Not because I'm lazy, but because it freezes out my connection with the world in general.

Sometimes it feels like I'm just doing whatever I can cope with, to stop myself going crazy.

[robvalue]

I'm feeling a bit better this morning

Thank you everyone for your lovely support yesterday, it made a very real difference to me

[J a c k]

Glad you're doing better! 

[robvalue]

Thank you

Early days, not been awake long, but I seem to be feeling OK today too!

I hope everyone else is alright.

[rexbeccarox]

I got some information today that could possibly change my life for the better for the rest of it. Not gonna go off my meds; never gonna let my mental health get away from me again...

... but holy shit. Some stuff just won't be worrisome at all anymore.

I'm sure I'll find other stuff to be anxious about, though. Sigh. Depression is a serious, motherfucking, nasty bitch. I will continue to kick her ass, though, even if she won't die.

Bitch.

[robvalue]

That is wonderful to hear! Excellent

I understand totally. We must keep on kicking the crap out of our depression. Keep it locked in the boot instead of grabbing the wheel. We're all behind you!

[rexbeccarox]

That is wonderful to hear! Excellent

I understand totally. We must keep on kicking the crap out of our depression. Keep it locked in the boot instead of grabbing the wheel. We're all behind you!

Keeping her locked in the boot doesn't work forever, darlin'! We need to drag her out of the boot, kick the crap out of her, and then murder her in cold blood before she even gets behind the wheel! Slash her throat! 

Ok... I admittedly have a slight bipolar tendency. Sometimes my ideas are a little out-there

[robvalue]

Oh, of course! I meant between brutal beatings

I'm not afraid of taking my depression into the woods and hacking it to pieces with a rusty saw. I know it will reanimate eventually, but until then, I'll just shove it in the boot and drag it around. I know I can't simply leave it behind, so I put it where it can cause least harm.

When I'm feeling relatively strong, I see it coming with its bullshit and I'm ready to kick the crap out of it again. It's when I'm vulnerable that it creeps up on me, like Agent 47 wearing a disguise, and I don't realize until it's got me in a choke hold. But I'm getting better at fighting back, even when this does happen. Even if it sabotages my day, I'm more likely to bounce back the next day after getting its grubby mitts from around my neck.

If you ever need a hand with the beatings, I'm only too happy!

[rexbeccarox]

Yessssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssssss!

[Little lunch]

The Empress, something you said reminded me of my depression.
It's a particular feeling where you've made a decision that don't want to kill yourself because of the pain it would cause your loved ones but you also want to end it so badly and it becomes a catch 22.
You end up feeling trapped on this earth.
It produces a wierd sought of reverberating insanity.
So glad I'm not there anymore.