Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: March 29, 2024, 6:08 am

Thread Rating:
  • 0 Vote(s) - 0 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
#11
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 11:46 am)mh.brewer Wrote: To blow jesus out wouldn't I have to insert him first? That may be what you want but I don't think I'm gonna comply. 

Declaring my ass a jesus free zone.

Ehhh growing up in the Bible Belt, I have the unfortunate knowledge and experience to know that they shove Jesus right up your butthole at an early age. And if that's all you get shoved up there, you're lucky. I'm just oH so grateful I never went to Bible Camp. Who the hell gives their kids up no questions asked to complete strangers just because they're wearing a Jesus tshirt???
If I were to create self aware beings knowing fully what they would do in their lifetimes, I sure wouldn't create a HELL for the majority of them to live in infinitely! That's not Love, that's sadistic. Therefore a truly loving god does not exist!

Quote:The sin is against an infinite being (God) unforgiven infinitely, therefore the punishment is infinite.

Dead wrong.  The actions of a finite being measured against an infinite one are infinitesimal and therefore merit infinitesimal punishment.

Quote:Some people deserve hell.

I say again:  No exceptions.  Punishment should be equal to the crime, not in excess of it.  As soon as the punishment is greater than the crime, the punisher is in the wrong.

[Image: tumblr_n1j4lmACk61qchtw3o1_500.gif]
Reply
#12
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 12:56 pm)Luckie Wrote:
(September 3, 2017 at 11:46 am)mh.brewer Wrote: To blow jesus out wouldn't I have to insert him first? That may be what you want but I don't think I'm gonna comply. 

Declaring my ass a jesus free zone.

Ehhh growing up in the Bible Belt, I have the unfortunate knowledge and experience to know that they shove Jesus right up your butthole at an early age. And if that's all you get shoved up there, you're lucky. I'm just oH so grateful I never went to Bible Camp. Who the hell gives their kids up no questions asked to complete strangers just because they're wearing a Jesus tshirt???

Future disillusioned plaintiffs?
Reply
#13
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 11:21 am)Little Rik Wrote:
(September 3, 2017 at 12:49 am)Minimalist Wrote: Having noted that I had 2,999 threads I decided to make #3,000 consistent with my general outlook.  For non-xhristards you make substitute whatever imaginary deity you have concocted and likewise blow that out your asses, too!

FSM Grin

As real as any of the others!


Gee, you must be very very old Min.  Bird

Of course you lived at the time of Jesus and witness that he was a bad man, did you?  I'm all ears!

Evidence Min you got all the bullcrap evidence that is why you know that Jesus was such a bad man.
Who would doubt your evidence.
Not me of course.  Indubitably

Fuck you and your silly fucking god.
Reply
#14
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
To any of you who may know, is jesus gerbil sized?
I don't have an anger problem, I have an idiot problem.
Reply
#15
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
Now that I think of it, I've blown Jesus out my ass many times, having been a cracker-eating Catholic for many years. Seems to have changed color a bit on the way through, though.
If you get to thinking you’re a person of some influence, try ordering somebody else’s dog around.
Reply
#16
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
Since the trinity is supposedly omnipresent, of course they're inside all of our anuses, turds, toilets and sewers.
Religions were invented to impress and dupe illiterate, superstitious stone-age peasants. So in this modern, enlightened age of information, what's your excuse? Or are you saying with all your advantages, you were still tricked as easily as those early humans?

---

There is no better way to convey the least amount of information in the greatest amount of words than to try explaining your religious views.
Reply
#17
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 1:21 am)vorlon13 Wrote: Well,

Anusius invokes an anal reality far superior to all other ass blown deities.

Vorls, I always thought you'd be a fan of this guy:

Thief and assassin for hire. Member in good standing of the Rogues Guild.
Reply
#18
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 11:42 am)vorlon13 Wrote:
(September 3, 2017 at 11:21 am)Little Rik Wrote: Gee, you must be very very old Min.  Bird

Of course you lived at the time of Jesus and witness that he was a bad man, did you?  I'm all ears!

Evidence Min you got all the bullcrap evidence that is why you know that Jesus was such a bad man.
Who would doubt your evidence.
Not me of course.  Indubitably


His followers incessant schisms suggest gross incompetence on His part in carrying out His mission, and the resulting confusion regarding His message has resulted in much 'bad'.


Your comment is an absolute nonsense and trifle Vorl.  Panic
How can you be responsible for what your grown up kids do.  Rolleyes

Not only that but imagine what would be of your message after hundreds of years?  
Free will lead both to improvement and corruption according to people, places and times.
You can create the best system in the whole universe but there is no guarantee that those who will come after you will follow such a system.
None of whatsoever Vorl.

Didn't you get a limited warranty when you purchased your car?
Why you think that the warranty is limited Vorl?  I'm all ears!

I let you to guess why Vorl hoping that your brain come up with something that make sense.  Bird

By the way Vorl do me a favor.  Thanks

Stop hanging on the pants of that nut case that engage in blasphemy 24/7 for your own mental stability.
This is a tip for a mate Vorl.  Lightbulb

He couldn't even get a job as a clown in a circus.  Indubitably
Reply
#19
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
Little Rik Wrote:
Vorlon13 Wrote:,
His followers incessant schisms suggest gross incompetence on His part in carrying out His mission, and the resulting confusion regarding His message has resulted in much 'bad'.


Your comment is an absolute nonsense and trifle Vorl.  
How can you be responsible for what your grown up kids do.  


By the way Vorl do me a favor.  

Stop hanging on the pants of that nut case that engage in blasphemy 24/7 for your own mental stability.
This is a tip for a mate Vorl.  

He couldn't even get a job as a clown in a circus.  Indubitably

*emotes deleted to make room for better ones

Um, is stupid your first language or are you trying to sound clever but don't speak English very well so it comes off wrong, or maybe do you have a disability? Please answer.This will determine your response.


If I were to create self aware beings knowing fully what they would do in their lifetimes, I sure wouldn't create a HELL for the majority of them to live in infinitely! That's not Love, that's sadistic. Therefore a truly loving god does not exist!

Quote:The sin is against an infinite being (God) unforgiven infinitely, therefore the punishment is infinite.

Dead wrong.  The actions of a finite being measured against an infinite one are infinitesimal and therefore merit infinitesimal punishment.

Quote:Some people deserve hell.

I say again:  No exceptions.  Punishment should be equal to the crime, not in excess of it.  As soon as the punishment is greater than the crime, the punisher is in the wrong.

[Image: tumblr_n1j4lmACk61qchtw3o1_500.gif]
Reply
#20
RE: Go Blow Jesus Out Your Ass
(September 3, 2017 at 12:49 am)Minimalist Wrote: Having noted that I had 2,999 threads I decided to make #3,000 consistent with my general outlook.  For non-xhristards you make substitute whatever imaginary deity you have concocted and likewise blow that out your asses, too!

FSM Grin

As real as any of the others!

Jesus will return. I hope at that time if you live that long, you will be humble enough to accept him as a true King of humanity, was and always will be.
Reply



Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  Dark matter kicks ass again. Please watch. ignoramus 3 901 June 4, 2018 at 11:29 am
Last Post: Angrboda
  Add your favorite JESUS QUOTE in this thread for comedy relief!! 21stCenturyIconoclast 33 4330 January 22, 2017 at 2:38 am
Last Post: Wyrd of Gawd
  God's Ass Nope 95 16854 August 12, 2015 at 2:33 pm
Last Post: Longhorn
  Kissing Hank's Ass lifesagift 5 2024 November 22, 2014 at 8:19 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Serious Q: Is it a sin to receive a blow job from a robot? Mudhammam 5 1419 August 9, 2014 at 4:21 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
Sad Christian Pastor: God wants you to beat the homosexuality out of your kids Miami_Marlins_fan 3 2976 May 3, 2012 at 10:34 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Jesus is trying to tell me something; what is it Jesus? TruthWorthy 32 13056 February 5, 2010 at 9:20 am
Last Post: Dotard



Users browsing this thread: 1 Guest(s)