First Holy Communion (reflections)

[vorlon13]

Doesn't work when a plane smacks in to a mountain at 500 miles per hour either . . .

Opps, everybody got pulped instantaneously . . .

[Minimalist]

Ever wonder what "god" does with all those stupid-assed prayers?

They collect them to level up.
Every billion prayers, they get to create another universe in our multiverse. True Story!

[ignoramus]

There really should be fineprint on airline tickets stating that in the event of instant death, they cannot guarantee either heaven or hell for customers ... And you thought the airline queue was long!

[vorlon13]

Members of the One True Faith, Baneemyism excepted, of course.

[CapnAwesome]

I went through first communion and its one of the most uncomfortable experiences of my life. All first communions are preceded by a first confession, where you have to confess all your sins privately to an elderly virgin in a small creepy room.

An 8 year old doesn't have sins, so I literally made stuff up, as did my brother and lots of other kids. Also you have to memorize a lot of prayers and dress up in uncomfortable clothes publically.  None of the kids really wanted to be there. It's humiliating and terrible really.

I have to say, probably one of my least favorite childhood experiences with the church, and you are told if you take communion with sin in your heart, it's a mortal sin, or that god might literally smite you.

---

Lol, I also made stuff up! That's funny.

Count me as a member of the made-up sins in confession club lol. I went to Catholic school grades K-12 and when they took us to confession, I made up sins to tell the priest because I was a pretty decent kid too other than typical kid-squabbles with my 4 brothers.

-Teresa

Haha, yeah, my younger brother also made up sins. That's what happens when you try to tell a fucking 8 year old that they are a sinner! The guilt tripping comes early as a Catholic. But I can one up almost everyone, cause my mother was a convert who was raised Jewish, so I was a Catholic with a Jewish mother! You can't even imagine what that level of feeling guilty is like!

[Catholic_Lady]

First time as an 8 year old I went in there and didnt say anything. The priest just gave me the confession blessing anyway. Second time as an 8 year old I confessed to being mean to my brother and disobeying my mom, both of which I did plenty of for my entire childhood.

[CapnAwesome]

You should of heard the horrible stuff they told us as children, that if we sinned we were responsible for the torture of Jesus. Really making an 8 year old confess their 'sins' to an elderly virgin is both fucked up and totally bizzare.

[chimp3]

You should of heard the horrible stuff they told us as children, that if we sinned we were responsible for the torture of Jesus. Really making an 8 year old confess their 'sins' to an elderly virgin is both fucked up and totally bizzare.

Regular people are better than those fucked up priests. How many times have you heard in your life "Kids will be kids!"  But the church had to gain control of the childhood socializing learning curve and turn in into something that requires their hand waving and permission. Fuck those bastard virgins and their acolytes. I agree, kids will be kids!

[Catholic_Lady]

You should of heard the horrible stuff they told us as children, that if we sinned we were responsible for the torture of Jesus. Really making an 8 year old confess their 'sins' to an elderly virgin is both fucked up and totally bizzare.

We were definitely taught that Jesus died for our sins, though I can't say I recall any talk of us torturing Him or an unhealthy level of guilt for wrongdoings. I went to a Catholic K - 8 school in Northwest Ohio, and then public high school. My husband went to the same k - 8 school I did, but then went to an all boy's Catholic High School. Needless to say, he's the higher achiever between the 2 of us lol.

[Abaddon_ire]

You should of heard the horrible stuff they told us as children, that if we sinned we were responsible for the torture of Jesus. Really making an 8 year old confess their 'sins' to an elderly virgin is both fucked up and totally bizzare.

We were definitely taught that Jesus died for our sins, though I can't say I recall any talk of us torturing Him or an unhealthy level of guilt for wrongdoings. I went to a Catholic K - 8 school in Northwest Ohio, and then public high school. My husband went to the same k - 8 school I did, but then went to an all boy's Catholic High School. Needless to say, he's the higher achiever between the 2 of us lol.

Hahaha, when I was a kid, such things were de riguer. The nuns were violent nazis with a penchant for physical abuse. I know for a fact that two of my contemporaries were sexually abused and i suspect there may have been more because one of those holy RCC folks propositioned me. The fucker backed away once he realised that I was not buying what he was selling. I wonder how many were not so fortunate?

Now the guy was a freak and one might consider that a one off.  But his fellow brother took science class and instructed us over and over about how much semen us boys could produce. What about the physics and chemistry? Fukkit. The biology of semen production was far more important.

You young boys can only produce a teaspoon of sperm, he liked to say. I have often wondered how he ever measured that .

Good ole catholic school. Isn't it marvelous, right?

Course, next out of the blocks will be 
"That was an exception" or such like. 

No, that was the norm back in the day.

It is the norm this day. I am directly involved in research in this regard so I know that the RCC are scum and will say anything to cover up.

You want to subscribe to that nonsense? Sure, Knock yourself out. But do not expect me to respect that nonsense