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Current time: December 15, 2024, 1:47 pm

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joke time
RE: joke time
I’m considering removing my dog’s tail.
My mother in law comes next weekend and I intend to get rid of anything that would give her the impression that she is welcome.
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RE: joke time
I f you have any empathy at all, think kindly on the cops in Alabama.

It's impossible to solve a crime, because the DNA is all identical and there are no dental records.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
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RE: joke time
Reaching the end of a job interview, the human resources person asked a young engineer fresh out of MIT: “What starting salary are you looking for?”
The engineer said: “In the neighborhood of $125,000 a year, depending on the benefits package.”
The interviewer said: “Well, what would you say to a package of 5-weeks vacation, 14 paid holidays, full medical and dental, company matching retirement fund to 50% of salary, and a company car leased every 2 years – say, a red Corvette?”
The engineer sat up straight and said: “Wow! Are you kidding?”
And the interviewer replied: “Yeah, but you started it.”
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RE: joke time
(January 29, 2022 at 5:00 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: A good name for a clone brothel would be 'Go Fuck Yourself'.

Boru

Wait a minute. Are clone brothels a thing? (Asking for a friend.)
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RE: joke time
^ I think they specialize in 2 for 1 deals with twins Dunno
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
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RE: joke time
(February 1, 2022 at 8:25 pm)vulcanlogician Wrote:
(January 29, 2022 at 5:00 am)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: A good name for a clone brothel would be 'Go Fuck Yourself'.

Boru

Wait a minute. Are clone brothels a thing? (Asking for a friend.)

(to the tune of Home on the Range)

Oh, give me a clone,
A clone of my own!
With the Y chromosome changed to X
And when we're alone,
That clone of my own
Will think about nothing but sex!
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RE: joke time
What did the man with the two foot high cock have for breakfast?

Well, this morning I had a boiled egg.


Schopenhauer Wrote:The intellect has become free, and in this state it does not even know or understand any other interest than that of truth.

Epicurus Wrote:The greatest reward of righteousness is peace of mind.

Epicurus Wrote:Don't fear god,
Don't worry about death;

What is good is easy to get,

What is terrible is easy to endure
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RE: joke time
A wife was making a breakfast of fried eggs for her husband.
Suddenly, her husband burst into the kitchen.
“Careful,” he said, “CAREFUL! Put in some more butter! Oh my GOD!
You’re cooking too many at once. TOO MANY! Turn them! TURN THEM NOW! We need more butter. Oh my GOD! WHERE are we going to get MORE BUTTER? They’re going to STICK! Careful . CAREFUL! I said be CAREFUL! You NEVER listen to me when you’re cooking! Never! Turn them! Hurry up! Are you CRAZY? Have you LOST your mind? Don’t forget to salt them. You know you always forget to salt them.
Use the salt. USE THE SALT! THE SALT!”
The wife stared at him. “What in the world is wrong with you? You think I don’t know how to fry a couple of eggs?”

The husband calmly replied, “I just wanted to show you what it feels like when I’m driving.”
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RE: joke time
(February 1, 2022 at 9:16 pm)ignoramus Wrote: ^ I think they specialize in 2 for 1 deals with twins Dunno


Does this mean a threesome is really a "onesome"?
Disappointing theists since 1968!
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RE: joke time
(February 2, 2022 at 9:32 pm)A. Secular Human Wrote:
(February 1, 2022 at 9:16 pm)ignoramus Wrote: ^ I think they specialize in 2 for 1 deals with twins Dunno


Does this mean a threesome is really a "onesome"?

Technically yes, but some women get all funny about it when you do their twin sister(s). Dunno
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Reply



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