Our server costs ~$56 per month to run. Please consider donating or becoming a Patron to help keep the site running. Help us gain new members by following us on Twitter and liking our page on Facebook!
Current time: December 16, 2024, 1:41 am
Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Thread Rating:
  • 1 Vote(s) - 5 Average
  • 1
  • 2
  • 3
  • 4
  • 5
Thread Modes
joke time
polymath257 Offline
Member
***
Religious Views: Atheist
Posts: 2412
Threads: 5
Joined: January 3, 2018
Reputation: 22
#4631
RE: joke time
March 13, 2021 at 6:28 pm
How do you lasso an element?

Europium.
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
*******
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 46324
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#4632
RE: joke time
March 13, 2021 at 6:39 pm
(March 13, 2021 at 6:25 pm)Brian37 Wrote: The next time you burp or fart around someone, don't say "Excuse me", but "I made it myself."

Trust me, more often than not, you will have someone around you busting a gut.

We move in very different circles, you and I.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
arewethereyet Offline
Don't make me use my mom voice!
*******
Religious Views: Yawn...
Posts: 16554
Threads: 128
Joined: July 10, 2013
Reputation: 65
#4633
RE: joke time
March 13, 2021 at 6:53 pm
(March 13, 2021 at 6:39 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote:
(March 13, 2021 at 6:25 pm)Brian37 Wrote: The next time you burp or fart around someone, don't say "Excuse me", but "I made it myself."

Trust me, more often than not, you will have someone around you busting a gut.

We move in very different circles, you and I.

Boru

I applaud your ability to come up with an apt response.  I'm still sitting here with my mouth agape.
[Image: MmQV79M.png]  
                                      
Find
Reply
no one Offline
That thing that should not be
****
Religious Views: Certainly not
Posts: 6112
Threads: 53
Joined: September 25, 2018
Reputation: 20
#4634
RE: joke time
March 13, 2021 at 7:03 pm
Brian 4 moves in well rounded circles, while 37, on the other hand, moves in trapezoidal circles.
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
*******
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 46324
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#4635
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 4:44 am
Did you know that a school of piranhas can devour a small child down to the bone in a matter of minutes?

Anyway, I'm no longer allowed to volunteer at the aquarium.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35312
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4636
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 5:40 am
My parents always taught me to eat what was put down in front of me.

Anyway, I failed the gynaecology course..

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
BrianSoddingBoru4 Offline
Power-Drunk Administrator
*******
Religious Views: Headology
Posts: 46324
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation: 109
#4637
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 6:12 am
Until you do archery blindfolded, you won't know what you're missing.

Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35312
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4638
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 12:43 pm (This post was last modified: March 14, 2021 at 1:10 pm by The Valkyrie.)
A man goes to a shrink.

"I have a problem with premature ejaculation. Can you help?"

"No, but I can introduce you to a woman with a short attention span."

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
The Valkyrie Offline
The last smile some will see...
*******
Religious Views: Time to end them
Posts: 35312
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation: 146
#4639
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 5:33 pm (This post was last modified: March 14, 2021 at 5:33 pm by The Valkyrie.)
A guy broke into my house last night.

I don't have a gun.

But I do have a laser pointer.

I aimed it for his forehead and let the cats do the rest.

Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:

"You did WHAT?  With WHO?  WHERE???"
Find
Reply
onlinebiker Offline
Senior Member
****
Religious Views: cynical S.O.B.
Posts: 9538
Threads: 410
Joined: October 3, 2018
Reputation: 17
#4640
RE: joke time
March 14, 2021 at 7:41 pm
Just the other way around here..

The cat is worthless... Sorta a tribble with legs...


But - I do have a gun... With a laser.....


...
Find
Reply


Atheist Forums › Discussion › Humor v
joke time

Possibly Related Threads...
Thread Author Replies Views Last Post
  No joke -- I have decided to convert to Christianity! Jehanne 10 2750 April 23, 2021 at 9:54 pm
Last Post: arewethereyet
  A sacred joke. Mystic 15 3310 January 20, 2018 at 10:00 pm
Last Post: Cyberman
  Big Bang Theory Neil Tyson joke Brian37 1 1607 May 18, 2016 at 8:07 pm
Last Post: vorlon13
  There Has To Be A Joke Here, Somewhere! Minimalist 3 2539 October 1, 2014 at 10:57 pm
Last Post: Zidneya
  Joke Minimalist 59 18803 June 27, 2014 at 12:25 am
Last Post: Ravenshire
  A little joke Sup 11 4743 April 10, 2014 at 7:33 pm
Last Post: BrianSoddingBoru4
  Evolution (is a) joke JesusLover1 12 9434 March 2, 2014 at 6:24 pm
Last Post: Minimalist
  Preacher joke 02 Drich 2 1993 February 12, 2014 at 7:15 am
Last Post: NoraBrimstone
  Preacher joke 01 Drich 8 4845 January 20, 2014 at 12:31 am
Last Post: Drich
  Make Up An Atheist Joke freedomfromforum 5 3050 October 6, 2013 at 12:30 am
Last Post: Angrboda



Users browsing this thread: 84 Guest(s)