Anxiety/Depression/Mental Illness Support

[Faith No More]

Zentor, I was in treatment at the age of sixteen aslo, but I didn't get my illness under control until I was thirty. Looking back, the struggles were worth enduring to get where I am today. I know the process can be overwheliming and the length it takes unbearable, but there is a good life out there waiting for you. You just have cling to hope and persevere. Easier said than done, I know.

A friend of mine killed himself when he was your age, and it was devastating to his friends and family. I do believe that if he had the opportunity to see the pain he caused by committing suicde, he would never have gone through with it. Suicide doesn't erase the pain you have, it just spreads it around to the people who care about you.

Now to flip my message upside down; I'm suffering a particularly bad bout of depression at the moment. Not the normal kind where "things I used to enjoy aren't fun" like I usually seem to frequently have but a really shitty one where I cannot resolve to do a single thing. I can't even play a video game, or write, or, fuck, I can't even cook. And when I can't get the motivation to cook, well, trust me, that's the biggest indicator of a problem with me you can ever get.

Anybody have any ideas how to break this? Or at least give myself some breathing space of some kind? Also, this seems to happen once every two weeks, not reliably, but on average, so any ideas on breaking this that really work would be a hell of a great thing to have.

While you're in the throws of a really bad episode, try to do whatever you can to occupy your mind. Whatch a movie, go for a walk while listening to music, or do anything that stops your brain from obsessing over its sadness. The real key, however, is to recognize when a depressive episode is coming and do what you can to stop it. Again, taking walks was great for me, and exercise is good no matter what, so if you feel as if you're starting to get down, take a nice walk. If you walk regularly, that can be a big help too.

[Tempus]

Now to flip my message upside down; I'm suffering a particularly bad bout of depression at the moment. Not the normal kind where "things I used to enjoy aren't fun" like I usually seem to frequently have but a really shitty one where I cannot resolve to do a single thing. I can't even play a video game, or write, or, fuck, I can't even cook. And when I can't get the motivation to cook, well, trust me, that's the biggest indicator of a problem with me you can ever get.

Anybody have any ideas how to break this? Or at least give myself some breathing space of some kind? Also, this seems to happen once every two weeks, not reliably, but on average, so any ideas on breaking this that really work would be a hell of a great thing to have.

That sounds familiar to me. I find that (among other things) change helps. That is, don't play a game you've already played, don't watch a movie you've already watched, don't jog a route you've already gone before, don't cook something you've cooked before, etc. I've found that doing something different, whether it be a variation on the activities I already engage in or a totally new activity, usually raises my mood. If I had to speculate, I'd say this is because change forces a focus on processing new information, rather than reviewing info you already have. Doing activities you already do in the same manner can give you a feeling of just going through the motions and aimlessness. Also, your mind wanders when you're familiar / bored with things. Well, that's how it is for me anyway.

ETA: Woo, 400 posts! Arbitrary milestone!

[Annik]

Watch Food Network, they show you how to make different kinds of food. You'll be more inspired to make food.

[Autumnlicious]

My job is driving me crazy.

It's not the work. It's the fact that people make sweeping changes, affect my code and revert some of my edits and are totally bumfuck wrong.

One character has been driving me crazy because he never asks but always assumes. In person he becomes obstinate and our code arguments last hours.

I'm having difficulties letting go of this game (so other people can work on it) when someone is actively wrecking it at times out of ignorance. Because then I obsess on work.

Obsess obsess obsess.

Some people are odious. Odious. Odious...

[Jackalope]

I haven't really been myself lately.

From all external appearances, I've been doing pretty well. It's no secret here that I suffer from bipolar disorder (manic depression) - that's been under control for the better part of six months. Less known is that I also suffer post-traumatic stress. That's not something I care to speak much of publicly, as the causes of that are both very personal and very painful. That too has been fairly quiet lately, for which I am extremely grateful.

There's a third piece to my mental health puzzle that I don't think I've shared before - Depersonalization disorder - which is thought to be strongly related to post-traumatic stress in my case. (While DD is considered a dissociative spectrum disorder, it is distinctly different from Dissociative Identity Disorder, a.k.a multiple personality disorder).

Unfortunately, right now, I am unable to relate what it is that I'm feeling.

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Depersonalization_disorder

[...] As the core symptoms of the disorder are thought to protect the victim from negative stimuli, depersonalization disorder can be conceptualized as a defense mechanism.

Depersonalization as a symptom is an anomaly of self-awareness and sufferers can feel divorced from their own personal physicality by sensing their body's sensations, feelings, emotions and behaviors as not belonging to the same person or identity. Also, a recognition of self breaks down (hence the name), resulting in a loss of conviction with one's identity and a sense that it "slips away". Depersonalization can result in very high anxiety levels, which can intensify these perceptions even further. Often individuals find it hard to remember anything they saw, thought or experienced during this dissociative period, which can last from minutes to years (as well as vary in intensity).

Although the disorder is an alteration in the subjective experience of reality, it is not related to psychosis, [...] sufferers are able to distinguish between reality and fantasy, and their grasp on reality remains stable at all times.

Common descriptions of symptoms are: feeling disconnected from one's physicality; feeling as though one is not completely occupying the body; not feeling in control of one's speech or physical movements; feeling detached from one's own thoughts or emotions; a sense of automation, going through the motions of life but not experiencing it or participating in it; loss of conviction with one's identity; feeling a disconnection from one's body; inability to accept ones reflection as one's own; difficulty relating oneself to reality and the environment; feeling as though one is in a dream; and even out-of-body experiences'. Individuals with the disorder commonly describe a feeling as though time is 'passing' them by and they are not in the notion of the present.

Fears of going crazy, losing control and losing one's identity (letting it "slip away") are common complaints. Individuals report occupational impairments as they feel they are working below their ability, impeded from participating and engaging with their external surroundings, as well as interpersonal troubles since they have an emotional disconnection from those they care about. [...]

[...] Depersonalization disorder is thought to be largely caused by severe traumatic lifetime events including childhood abuse, accidents, war, torture, panic attacks and bad drug experiences. [...]

[Shell B]

Syn, I think you need to unwind from work more when you aren't there. I know, I know, saying and doing are different.

CD, I'm sorry to hear that. I hope you shift back into place soon. If you need me, you know the drill.

[zentor]

Hey just few things on my mind, like I'm officially filing for diability,
I've tried everything I can and I just can't do work or college .
Swtor really is a good escape from rl for me except some of the human connotations.

The casual sex in the game makes me depressed, especially the adultery.

Even though I'm liberal, and even though I'll be alone all my life, I always thought sex and love should be special, and it makes me sad cuz in the game
I am reminded that everyone is having a nice life and tons of sex
And I am just rotting away.
Also makes me hate how evil human beings are.
What can u recommend to cope?
I'm sorry for disturbing u but this game is all I have now, and
I need it to be good.
People are mean to be and I accept that but some are nice.
But everyone has to brag, why can't people just be humble and
Carefree?
Hope u reply

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That was meant to be a pm, it works here too i guess, more people can advice me
(phone messing me, thought I was sending pm lol)

[The Grand Nudger]

Try shooting things.............(preferably not human beings).

Seriously, if you have a condition wtf are you doing on AF asking for help? Get actual help, get laid, get better hobbies. That's all I've got.

(Moros, I also recommend shooting things for your day to day issues, but in your case the qualifier can be omitted.)

[Angrboda]

zentor.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=SVGbS47Jey0

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My hallway appears longer and darker than it has ever been.
And I no longer know how to navigate it.
I suspect the way is lost, and I must step up my game if I have a hope of surviving.
And I suspect around the building and in the various rooms there may be cameras hidden.
But if I go looking for them, I will not find them.
Too much has been given and too little remained hidden.
I do not know the way anymore.
Are the starships still inside me?
I need to learn to run faster.

[Epimethean]

Ah, the confused Thelemite song! Love it!