Male Rape - An Invisible Problem

[Hovik]

In these instances, people aren't up in arms about it because men "cannot be raped" in the eyes of society. A man's peers will ridicule him for speaking up about it; strangers will say how "lucky" he is to have gotten laid. Hell, even the police will outright refuse to help and say point-blank that men can't be raped.

according to their definition of rape, the police are correct.

I'm sorry but guilt and coercion are not rape and I KNOW that it would be offensive to the millions of women who have been brutally raped without question or coercion but only raw brutal force to call it that.


According to your definition - men are being raped (by women), but not according to mine. Sexual abuse/assault/molestation is abhorrent to me, but I do not call them rape.

Sex without consent is rape. Period. End of definition. The key issue here is consent, not physically overpowering the other person. When a person coerces another into having sex with them against their will, that's rape irrespective of gender.

Also, how can you seriously justify the death penalty for rapists? Nobody deserves the death penalty.

[Tiberius]

Cinjin:

1) You having only seen two reports in your life doesn't mean it doesn't happen, or that it is rare. There is a massive social stigma attached to being a man and admitting to being raped. More often than not, they are laughed at and not taken seriously. This is simply not the case with women rape victims.

2) Again, strength is only part of it. There are many other ways to rape someone. I disagree with your assertion that a woman who tells a man to have sex with her, else she'd say he raped her, is not rape. If the reverse happened, and a man told a woman to have sex with him, else he'd brand her a "slut" or say she'd committed some other kind of crime, would that not be rape? Rape should be, quite simply, non-consensual sex. Being forced into doing something in no way means you are consenting.

3) I don't understand your emphasis on "truly". You do realise that most rapes happen in the home right? Rape is rape. It doesn't become "more rape-ish" if it happens outdoors, or in some secluded area under cover of darkness.

4) I'm pretty sure we all understand the basics of what rape is. It's non-consensual sex. It shouldn't matter if the person not giving consent is a man or a woman. No should mean no. Not saying yes should mean no. Being unable to consent for whatever reason should mean no.

[Hovik]

Sex without consent is rape. Period. End of definition.

When a person coerces another into having sex with them against their will, that's rape irrespective of gender.

No, once again, that is YOUR definition of rape. Clearly that is not everyone's definition of rape.

Then explain to me how it isn't rape. Arguing that the legal definitions of rape don't corroborate it is pointless as laws vary and don't necessarily reflect reality.

Sex without consent is rape. That's it.

[frankiej]

Sex without consent is rape. That's it.

What if they are both mutes without hands? I'm sure it might be difficult to determine whether consent was given.

[Cinjin]

Sex without consent is rape ... yes that's true. If someone is physically being forced to actually have sex. Absolutely.

I never said it wasn't. I said that guilting someone into having sex with you is not rape, they are no longer an unwilling member. They are making a conscious choice. Don't get me wrong, it's a disgusting notion, but that person is not being physically forced to perform any kind of sex act. They are allowing a douchebag to manipulate their mind into doing something. The law does not consider it rape. Sorry, my opinion is apparently shared by many. You may feel free to think it is wrong.


EDIT: Husbands guilt their wives into having sex with them for their birthdays ... are they rapists? Spare me.

[Tiberius]

This should be less about the definition of rape, and more about the fact that men (like women) can have sex forced upon them against their will.

Whether you call it rape or not is irrelevant at that point; it still happens, it's still horrific, and it still needs to be recognised as illegal.

[Hovik]

Sex without consent is rape ... yes that's true. If someone is physically being forced to actually have sex. Absolutely.

I never said it wasn't. I said that guilting someone into having sex with you is not rape, they are no longer an unwilling member. They are making a conscious choice. Don't get me wrong, it's a disgusting notion, but that person is not being physically forced to perform any kind of sex act. They are allowing a douchebag to manipulate their mind into doing something. The law does not consider it rape. Sorry, my opinion is apparently shared by many. You may feel free to think it is wrong.


EDIT: Husbands guilt their wives into having sex with them for their birthdays ... are they rapists? Spare me.

So let me get this perfectly straight. In your view, threatening somebody as to coerce them into having sex with you doesn't constitute rape? Let's say a person threatens another person's life under the demand of sex. The person who is being raped believes that he or she has no other alternative. Under your definition, that would not be considered rape.

If a woman threatens to call the police and say that the man raped her, and the man believes that he either has to have sex with her or face a potentially life-ruining scenario, that isn't rape?

Sex without consent is rape. Since when did "consent" mean "ability to physically resist"?

[Tiberius]

FYI, since we're apparently still defining things...

Wikipedia: "Rape is a type of sexual assault usually involving sexual intercourse, which is initiated by one or more persons against another person without that person's consent. A person who commits an act of rape is known as a rapist. The act may be carried out by physical force, coercion, abuse of authority or with a person who is incapable of valid consent. The term is most often defined in criminal law."

Wiktionary: "The act of forcing sexual intercourse or other sexual activity upon another person, without their consent and/or against their will."

Dictionary.com: "the unlawful compelling of a person through physical force or duress to have sexual intercourse."
Dictionary.com: "any act of sexual intercourse that is forced upon a person."

Oxford English Dictionary: "the crime, typically committed by a man, of forcing another person to have sexual intercourse with the offender against their will" (bolding mine, "typically" does not mean "always")

I'm sure there are more than are either gender neutral, or that conditionally mention men.

[Autumnlicious]

Warning

The last time we got a discussion thread about rape, things blew up.

This is a Moros notice to all that this thread must not become overtly vitriolic or insulting, on pain of closing thread.

[Annik]

I just want to say that by threatening to falsely accuse them of rape, they were effectively holding a knife to their throats. Are women who give in after being threatened (or having the lives of their family/friends) not raped? That's a very thin line...