Posts: 66329
Threads: 140
Joined: June 28, 2011
Reputation:
160
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 1:24 pm
The only significant difference between the christian version of the shell game and your much more competent street version..is that in the christian variant, you'll find jesus under any shell you happen to choose.
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation:
156
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 1:27 pm
And if the shell is empty, that's cast iron proof he was there!
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Posts: 66329
Threads: 140
Joined: June 28, 2011
Reputation:
160
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 1:29 pm
Well, it does smell like Jesus under there after all...
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
Posts: 69248
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation:
259
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 1:43 pm
(September 6, 2012 at 1:29 pm)Rhythm Wrote: Well, it does smell like Jesus under there after all...
![[Image: smells-like-bullshit.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=standupforamerica.files.wordpress.com%2F2009%2F06%2Fsmells-like-bullshit.jpg)
Posts: 13900
Threads: 262
Joined: January 11, 2009
Reputation:
82
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 2:05 pm
Lets pretend there was an empty tomb for a second.
There must be a million explanations for an empty tomb that doesn't imply being spirited up.
1: Wrong tomb.
2: A homosexual necrophiliac stole the body for fun and games.
3: He wasn't dead got up and left
4: Kids playing a prank.
5: Aliens.
These are just off the top of my head.
All more likely than goddit.
You can fix ignorance, you can't fix stupid.
Tinkety Tonk and down with the Nazis.
Posts: 69248
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation:
259
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 2:19 pm
Quote:All more likely than goddit.
The True Believer ( you know, what I call an "asshole") just can't see that.
Posts: 5436
Threads: 138
Joined: September 6, 2012
Reputation:
58
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 2:21 pm
(September 6, 2012 at 9:29 am)KichigaiNeko Wrote: Aren't there many caves in the Galilee area that "could' be used a tombs??
My Gosh, you're right! That is 100% proof that there was not one Jesus, but lots of Jesuses! (Jesusi?) I don't know how Christians could of missed that. There isn't an empty tomb, there are empty tombs! Give me the explanation for that if it doesn't mean that there were multiple Jesusi running around.
Posts: 69248
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation:
259
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 2:22 pm
If there are 3 empty tombs that could explain the trinity.
Posts: 25314
Threads: 239
Joined: August 26, 2010
Reputation:
156
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 2:47 pm
(September 6, 2012 at 2:21 pm)CapnAwesome Wrote: (September 6, 2012 at 9:29 am)KichigaiNeko Wrote: Aren't there many caves in the Galilee area that "could' be used a tombs??
My Gosh, you're right! That is 100% proof that there was not one Jesus, but lots of Jesuses! (Jesusi?) I don't know how Christians could of missed that. There isn't an empty tomb, there are empty tombs! Give me the explanation for that if it doesn't mean that there were multiple Jesusi running around.
Matter of fact there would have been hundreds of Jesuseses running about. The one with all the magic managed to erase himself from the pages of history. The biggest miracle of all - existing only in the mind of people in desperate need to believe you existed at all.
![[Image: dreamszz5.gif]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=i255.photobucket.com%2Falbums%2Fhh146%2FKorpikari%2Fdreamszz5.gif)
That or in the glib tongue of those seeking to profit from such people.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
Posts: 69248
Threads: 3759
Joined: August 2, 2009
Reputation:
259
RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 3:20 pm
Quote:That or in the glib tongue of those seeking to profit from such people.
Ah, yes. The Greatest Story Ever Sold.
|
