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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 3:34 pm
Folks, I have the answer to the mystery. It seems Jesus never had a tomb. He was an executed convict and under Roman law, all executed convicts were dumped in a large unmarked gravesite for dogs and rats to devour. The story that Joseph of Arimethea gave the tomb to Jesus is a Gospel invention. It wouldn't have happened in ancient Rome.
Notice when St Paul tried to show that Jesus had resurrected, he didn't mention the empty tomb? He spoke about having seen Jesus himself but not once did he say, "The tomb was empty". Because there was no tomb.
When the Gospel of Mark first put in this fanciful story of a tomb, the writer was afraid Christians would say, "But why haven't I heard of an empty tomb? St Paul never mentioned it when he was alive". To forestall that, he told the story that only the women saw the empty tomb. And they didn't tell anyone because they were afraid. The writer of St Mark was hoping that readers would say to themselves, "Aha! I see it now. The reason why I've never heard of the empty tomb is because unreliable women were the only ones who saw the tomb and further more, they didn't tell anyone as St Mark wrote it."
All this shows there was no tomb to begin with. Jesus' body was rotting in the mass grave for executed criminals and his body parts torn up and eaten by dogs and rats.
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 3:36 pm
(This post was last modified: September 6, 2012 at 3:37 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
(September 6, 2012 at 3:34 pm)greneknight Wrote: All this shows there was no tomb to begin with. Jesus' body was rotting in the mass grave for executed criminals and his body parts torn up and eaten by dogs and rats.
....Or not. But thats equally creative and gruesome, a fitting end to the scapegoating narrative. 
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 3:41 pm
As I understand it - and I freely confess my ignorance in this area - that was pretty much the fate of convicted criminals, in an age when such criminals would have been put to the sword without trial. Crucifixion, being such a public thing, was restricted mainly to political insurgents as a warning to the populace: "This could be you!" Which sort of puts the lie to the two thieves or whatever they were that were nailed up next to our hero.
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 4:14 pm
"Paul" (unless that story is nothing more than pious fiction, too) had a hallucination of jesus. He never met him.
These days, we take people like that, lock them up and shoot them full of thorazine and hope they get less dangerous.
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 4:50 pm
(This post was last modified: September 6, 2012 at 4:52 pm by Cyberman.)
I've had hallucinations myself; they can be astonishingly convincing. Apart from strange musical sounds and the time I could swear my mobile had gone off - I keep it on vibrate and I know it went off - all accountable to my medication, I've experienced the phenomenon known as hypnagogia and it seems as totally real as the chair you're sitting in. It's rather a strange and spooky story - cue X-Files theme.
Basically, several years ago my sweetheart had gone to visit our friend Shell who lived three floors above us and since the time was getting on I'd decided to turn in for the night. Not long afterward, I distinctly heard Sam's voice from outside the bedroom door, calling for me in a weak, sickly sort of voice; then I heard her moan as though in pain. I flew out of bed and flung open the door - nobody there. I opened the front door and looked about; again, nobody there. I realised what it must have been since I'd come across the phenomenon somewhere on my travels around the web, but I sat there in bed almost in shock and not knowing what to do. Then about half an hour later I heard light footsteps trotting down the stairs followed by the entry of Sam, safe and well. If I'd been more superstitously-inclined I might have started a religion myself.
Then there was that time when my growling intestines clearly and distinctly shouted "Oi!" at me, but that was less hallucination and more gastric (or enteric, for my fellow pedants).
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 5:39 pm
When they say "Oy Vey" - time to see a doctor.
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 5:48 pm
I've never experienced a hallucination.
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 6:08 pm
How do you know you're not experiencing one right now? Maybe all of this that you think I've typed is merely in your head..?
How very Zen of me!
At the age of five, Skagra decided emphatically that God did not exist. This revelation tends to make most people in the universe who have it react in one of two ways - with relief or with despair. Only Skagra responded to it by thinking, 'Wait a second. That means there's a situation vacant.'
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 7:15 pm
greneknight Wrote:And they didn't tell anyone because they were afraid. The writer of St Mark was hoping that readers would say to themselves, "Aha! I see it now. The reason why I've never heard of the empty tomb is because unreliable women were the only ones who saw the tomb and further more, they didn't tell anyone as St Mark wrote it." 'The women told no one about it' said 2.2 billion Christians.
Does anyone see the problem here?
"It is the mark of an educated mind to be able to entertain a thought without accepting it" ~ Aristotle
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RE: "How do you explain the empty tomb?"
September 6, 2012 at 7:21 pm
(September 6, 2012 at 7:15 pm)FallentoReason Wrote: greneknight Wrote:And they didn't tell anyone because they were afraid. The writer of St Mark was hoping that readers would say to themselves, "Aha! I see it now. The reason why I've never heard of the empty tomb is because unreliable women were the only ones who saw the tomb and further more, they didn't tell anyone as St Mark wrote it." 'The women told no one about it' said 2.2 billion Christians.
Does anyone see the problem here?
Well, derp. Of course there's a problem there. 
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