He's Back!

[Cinjin]

I think it's hilarious that we do indeed have a self proclaimed anti-christ here on earth now and he's already got a huge mass of followers. It's just so fucking awesome.

One might think that when the "real" anti-christ shows up, no one will even take it seriously. LMAO I mean, if we don't take this one seriously, how is god going to put the fear of ... well, god into everybody.

Christianity is so fucking dumb. "I see jesus floating in the sky. Oh wait nevermind." "He's already here in Puerto Rico." lmfao.

[Minimalist]

If jesus has been jerking off for 2,000 years trying for a second cumming his dick must look like raw hamburger by now.

[LastPoet]

I am jesus! Send me all your money, please?

[Faith No More]

What gets me the most is that Jesus' return will allegedly be a bloody, violent episode, and for many of them that can't come soon enough.

[jonb]

The end of time will be like Terry Pratchett says. There will be a 'pop', as the last lost sock disappears. Or something like that

The end of time is now, and its started in my laundry basket, because my socks are disappearing like nobodies business.

[Pompey]

Being new to this forum, I very quickly noticed the term "Christian" is used to describe an extremely broad range of beliefs.

As for me, I believe Jesus is coming tomorrow, which is why I spent all my money on cookies and guacamole today. Also, an expensive puffy coat.

[Minimalist]

I very quickly noticed the term "Christian" is used to describe an extremely broad range of beliefs.

There are over 41,000 xtian sects according to Wiki. Every one of them thinks they're right.

Personally, I say screw them all.

[Christian]

36 “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,[a] but only the Father. 37 As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 38 For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; 39 and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 40 Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left. 41 Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left. 42 “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. 43 But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. 44 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.

Matthew 24:36-44

What gets me the most is that Jesus' return will allegedly be a bloody, violent episode, and for many of them that can't come soon enough.

Mister Sir Faith No More
No it won't. Why would Jesus Christ want to begin an everlasting kingdom of peace with an act of violence? Rather, Jesus's return will be filled with never-ending joy, love and peace.

[Dee Dee Ramone]

Mister Sir Faith No More
Rather, Jesus's return will be filled with never-ending joy, love and peace.

Let's start with the gangbang, he'll join later, right?

[Darth]

36 “But about that day or hour no one knows, not even the angels in heaven, nor the Son,[a] but only the Father. 37 As it was in the days of Noah, so it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 38 For in the days before the flood, people were eating and drinking, marrying and giving in marriage, up to the day Noah entered the ark; 39 and they knew nothing about what would happen until the flood came and took them all away. That is how it will be at the coming of the Son of Man. 40 Two men will be in the field; one will be taken and the other left. 41 Two women will be grinding with a hand mill; one will be taken and the other left. 42 “Therefore keep watch, because you do not know on what day your Lord will come. 43 But understand this: If the owner of the house had known at what time of night the thief was coming, he would have kept watch and would not have let his house be broken into. 44 So you also must be ready, because the Son of Man will come at an hour when you do not expect him.

Matthew 24:36-44

What gets me the most is that Jesus' return will allegedly be a bloody, violent episode, and for many of them that can't come soon enough.

Mister Sir Faith No More
No it won't. Why would Jesus Christ want to begin an everlasting kingdom of peace with an act of violence? Rather, Jesus's return will be filled with never-ending joy, love and peace.

Ah, so all that nonsense about multi headed enslaving dragon monsters, war, pestilence, death, famine, and cataclysmic disasters in the book of revelations is all a load of bunk then? Good to know.