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RE: If you were to make a book claiming to be revealed by God, how would you start?
April 7, 2013 at 5:50 pm
Hey, it's me, God. Sorry for all the evil and suffering. But in heaven you get free ice cream! All the ice cream you can eat! Now listen up, this is important.
Treat each other well. If you don't treat others well, don't expect to be treated well back.
Other than that, do what thou wilt.
Oh, and about sex. It's not a sin. I invented it for you to enjoy, so enjoy it (with consent).
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RE: If you were to make a book claiming to be revealed by God, how would you start?
April 7, 2013 at 8:09 pm
(This post was last modified: April 7, 2013 at 8:09 pm by The Grand Nudger.)
In any heaven that was worth it's salt, you could eat all the icecream you wanted and not get fat. What kind of budget rate motel is allah running?
I am the Infantry. I am my country’s strength in war, her deterrent in peace. I am the heart of the fight… wherever, whenever. I carry America’s faith and honor against her enemies. I am the Queen of Battle. I am what my country expects me to be, the best trained Soldier in the world. In the race for victory, I am swift, determined, and courageous, armed with a fierce will to win. Never will I fail my country’s trust. Always I fight on…through the foe, to the objective, to triumph overall. If necessary, I will fight to my death. By my steadfast courage, I have won more than 200 years of freedom. I yield not to weakness, to hunger, to cowardice, to fatigue, to superior odds, For I am mentally tough, physically strong, and morally straight. I forsake not, my country, my mission, my comrades, my sacred duty. I am relentless. I am always there, now and forever. I AM THE INFANTRY! FOLLOW ME!
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RE: If you were to make a book claiming to be revealed by God, how would you start?
May 13, 2013 at 5:12 am
(This post was last modified: May 13, 2013 at 5:36 am by smax.)
Hey people, God here. The truth is, I wasnt planning on writing anything. But theres a terrible rumor developing that I am working on a multi-book deal. I am writing now to clarify that there is no truth to this rumor whatsoever.
I've given a small percentage of you enough sense to figure that out on your own. It's up to you select few to keep the extremely gullible masses from buying into this rumor and eventually blowing themselves up over it.
Now, if you dont mind, I'm going on vacation now. Contrary to popular belief, creating.a Universe is quite challenging.and takes a lot out of you.
Ill be back in a few hundred thousand years.
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RE: If you were to make a book claiming to be revealed by God, how would you start?
May 13, 2013 at 3:49 pm
(This post was last modified: May 13, 2013 at 3:50 pm by smax.)
By the way, Jim Jeffries is the best. I love his line:
As far as I know, the devil doesnt have a book out.......... So, as far as I can see, he's being the bigger man.
![[Image: conv%20with%20god.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=www.allthingshealing.com%2FPortals%2F2%2FStock-Photos%2FMeditation%2Fconv%2520with%2520god.jpg)
![[Image: tumblr_mkcnwtSKaW1rl99hdo1_400.jpg]](https://images.weserv.nl/?url=25.media.tumblr.com%2F995f163fa3da922eb2fd19ea83f1b960%2Ftumblr_mkcnwtSKaW1rl99hdo1_400.jpg)
![[Image: earthp.jpg]](http://imageshack.us/photos/my-images/209/earthp.jpg/)
