Posts: 46313
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: joke time
March 13, 2019 at 2:54 pm
(March 13, 2019 at 2:27 pm)Brian37 Wrote: (March 13, 2019 at 2:14 pm)Divinity Wrote: My son-in-law (who is black) said this today, and got a good laugh from me:
"You know why I'm glad I videotaped the birth of my kids?"
"So you'll have the memories forever?"
"So I'll have some proof when they decide to run for President, and everyone is like "Where's the birth certificate? Where's the birth certificate? Can you prove you were born in America?" and they can be like "Bitch please, my daddy videotaped the whole thing."
You're lying. He'd not black, he is plaid!
He was born in Scotland. I"ve seen his skirt, and never mind his bigger bagpipes than mine. (Note to self: Did I think this, or type it?)
You typed it, more's the pity.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 686
Threads: 17
Joined: February 15, 2019
Reputation:
13
RE: joke time
March 13, 2019 at 6:09 pm
I have heard it said that is there is music in hell, it will be from bagpipes.
The Scottish response; Yes, IRISH bagpipes .. ......I've heard Irish bagpipes. The Scots have a point
Posts: 46313
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: joke time
March 14, 2019 at 7:08 am
(March 13, 2019 at 6:09 pm)fredd bear Wrote: I have heard it said that is there is music in hell, it will be from bagpipes.
The Scottish response; Yes, IRISH bagpipes .. ......I've heard Irish bagpipes. The Scots have a point
The Irish invented Highland pipes a thousand years ago, sent them to Scotland, and the Scots STILL haven't gotten the joke.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 46313
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: joke time
March 20, 2019 at 1:56 pm
If life hands you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 35310
Threads: 205
Joined: August 13, 2012
Reputation:
146
RE: joke time
March 21, 2019 at 3:17 am
(March 20, 2019 at 1:56 pm)BrianSoddingBoru4 Wrote: If life hands you melons, you're probably dyslexic.
Boru
If you're dyslexic be careful not to sell your soul to Santa.
Playing Cluedo with my mum while I was at Uni:
"You did WHAT? With WHO? WHERE???"
Posts: 20476
Threads: 447
Joined: June 16, 2014
Reputation:
111
RE: joke time
March 21, 2019 at 6:05 am
(This post was last modified: March 21, 2019 at 6:06 am by ignoramus.)
Guys, this is probably the least funny and most depressing joke ever:
In Venezuela right now, with 1,000,000% hyperinflation, the amount of money you need to buy a roll of toilet paper is actually about 10 times more paper (as paper money notes) than the roll of toilet paper itself!
No God, No fear.
Know God, Know fear.
Posts: 46313
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: joke time
March 21, 2019 at 1:03 pm
No matter how kind you think you are, German children are kinder.
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
Posts: 30726
Threads: 2123
Joined: May 24, 2012
Reputation:
71
RE: joke time
March 22, 2019 at 7:52 am
A ballet dancer was practicing on a dock and fell in the water. It was an example of pier-o-wet.
Posts: 46313
Threads: 540
Joined: July 24, 2013
Reputation:
109
RE: joke time
March 23, 2019 at 6:33 am
How To Speak Irish:
whale
oil
beef
hooked
(say it fast)
Boru
‘I can’t be having with this.’ - Esmeralda Weatherwax
